Quiet Connection - Postpartum Mental Health

Amanda C - Motherhood, Rage & Radical Intuition

Season 5 Episode 17

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In this deeply honest and emotionally resonant episode of Quiet Connection, Chelsea sits down with Amanda Curry, a physical therapist turned somatic healing guide, to explore her transformational journey through motherhood, postpartum mental health, and the powerful awakening that came through inner child work and breathwork. 

Amanda opens up about her struggles with postpartum rage, the shame of feeling disconnected, and how societal expectations and unhealed trauma shaped her early motherhood experience. She shares how listening to her intuition, embracing somatic healing, and finding supportive community allowed her to finally reconnect with herself and step into empowered motherhood. 

If you’ve ever felt rage, guilt, or emotional disconnection in motherhood, you are not broken. You are not alone. This conversation is for you.  

Key Takeaways 

  • Postpartum rage is real, common, and deeply misunderstood.
  • Somatic therapy and breathwork help regulate the nervous system and release suppressed emotions.
  • Many women operate in "high-functioning autopilot," masking emotional pain with productivity.
  • Inner child work can uncover the root of postpartum mental health struggles.
  • A supportive community is essential—but only accessible when we feel safe to receive it.
  • Trusting intuition is critical in both healing and parenting.
  • There’s no shame in struggling. Healing is messy but worth it.

Sound Bites / Pull Quotes 

  • “Motherhood cracks you open—and that’s not a bad thing.”
  • “Rage is a byproduct of anxiety, and it deserves to be witnessed, not shamed.”
  • “You can’t think your way out of rage. You have to feel your way through it.”
  • “I was doing everything ‘right,’ but still drowning in shame.”
  • “Healing isn’t linear. This is a season—not forever.”
  • “Trust that whisper inside you. That’s your intuition, and it’s powerful.”
  • “We were promised a village—but most of us have to build it ourselves.”

Learn more about Amanda by visiting her Instagram!

Support the show

Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection

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Chelsea Myers (00:05)
Welcome to Quiet Connection, a podcast dedicated to ending the stigma around postpartum mental health. I'm Chelsea. This week I'm connecting with Amanda as she shares her journey emotional turmoil, motherhood, and the importance of inner child work. She discusses the catalysts that led her to explore deeper healing practices, including breath work and somatic therapy.

Throughout our chat, she emphasizes the need for community support among mothers, the complexities of navigating postpartum rage, and the transformative power of trusting one's intuition. Here's Amanda.

Chelsea Myers (00:44)
Hello! Today I'm here with Amanda. Amanda, how are you?

Amanda Curry (00:49)
I'm good. I'm good. We are getting rolling on a Friday morning, 8 a.m. sharp.

Chelsea Myers (00:53)
Yeah

It's 8 a.m. For you. It's 9 a.m. For me, but it was cutting it close Let me tell you getting the kids off to school and dropped off whoa whoa Yeah, mine's out the door by by like 530 in the morning, so it's all yeah, it's all on me That's mom like yeah

Amanda Curry (00:59)
Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, I have a partner for that, so hats off to him.

Ooh, bless it. Then bless you then, actually.

Chelsea Myers (01:20)
Hashtag stay at home mom life. Amanda, I'm excited to have you. I'm excited to connect with you. I'm already getting like really good energy from you. So this is great. I'll start off by asking you to sort of introduce yourself a little bit and tell us who you were before you were a mom.

Amanda Curry (01:29)
Yeah.

okay. I am learning that I'm preferring these types of intros than the host reading it because the bio that I give podcasts is quite exhaustive. And then I feel like a pompous ass when I get done and they're like, here's Amanda. And I'm like, everyone has turned it off. They're like, no, I'm not listening to this chick. So thank you for letting me intro myself.

Chelsea Myers (01:39)
You

You

Absolutely.

Amanda Curry (02:01)
Yeah, so currently I am a contracted physical therapist for pediatric oncology patients, but I also, so I'm traditionally trained as a physical therapist. But since 2020, I dove into some deeper layers of my own healing and then became certified in a specific modality for somatic inner child work. also a breath work facilitator. And yeah, that's taken me up to this point currently.

where I am supporting women, overwhelmed moms, and some others sprinkled in there with their own journey and connecting back to themselves, their body, and their inner child to do some really incredible and transformative work. But yeah, I was in a writing class last night, which was so healing and fun and creative. so this pre-mom question is quite timely.

because we wrote on these topics just a little bit last night. So before I was a mom, I was someone that had no idea how much I had not traversed in my own, what I had experienced. Like had obviously lived my life, quote unquote, but I had not felt through the things that I had experienced on like, I would say a 10 % level. Like it was literally my actual body was floating through the experience, but I was not present to a lot of it at all.

Chelsea Myers (02:48)
Ha

Amanda Curry (03:14)
And I was really living and operating under so many learnings, behaviors, patterns, conditioning that were not mine. Like just full stop, they were not mine. They were from mom and dad. And it had taken me so far in life because I was in the gifts of some of those patterns and I had made it work for me, quote unquote, that I didn't, again, I was not conscious to how

Chelsea Myers (03:26)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (03:42)
debilitating it was going to be for me as I entered motherhood. But also how I was really just not operating in my truth and my essence because those words, if you would say that to me before I became a mom at 26, I would have been like, okay, you and your crystals can just go walk down the street. know, like it just that was not even in my realm. I was entrenched in mindset work. I was entrenched in Western medicine. And there's nothing wrong with either of those. But I realized as I was cracked open in motherhood that that

Chelsea Myers (03:57)
Yes.

Amanda Curry (04:10)
only was taking me so far. And so yeah, I was a type A overachiever, control freak, super happy on the outside, crumbling on the inside, projecting a lot of that hurt and anger onto my partner behind closed doors, like all the things. Like it was just Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, but only to a trusted few, which was really honestly one. And that was my partner, David.

Chelsea Myers (04:32)
Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, that that's, that's not uncommon at all. I hear that so much that like, before we were parents, especially if we were like, if we started our journey into parenting younger, I mean, I was 26, too. And I still consider that younger. But like, you just kind of like floating through life, like, not necessarily. Yeah. Yeah.

Amanda Curry (04:50)
Mm hmm. Yeah.

yeah.

Yeah. Checking all the boxes. Married at 21, babies at 26,

had the job, had the house. And then you were like, wait a second. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (05:10)
Yes,

exactly. It's like you're telling my story. In regard to that, kind of sounds like they were. Were kids on your radar? They were part of the plan? no.

Amanda Curry (05:15)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

No, absolutely. Well, I mean,

yes, they were on my radar because my husband wanted them. I was terrified to have children. I did not want to have children. I was going to have children out of devotion and love to my partner and be like, I guess I'll just raw dog this experience because I don't, I could be, you know, old and gray and not have kids. And, I, I use this, analogy. I used it yesterday with somebody and then I shared it with, my husband when we were at Disney is that

Chelsea Myers (05:27)
Okay.

Amanda Curry (05:46)
I find that when someone has a large part of them that doesn't want to do something, but then they still have enough of something that they do also want to do something. For instance, at Disney, it was my 10 year old, he was terrified to go on the Tower of Terror, but he never said, get me out of here. I want to leave. He just kept saying how scared he was. So I knew that there was a larger part of him that said, I really want to do this, but I'm really scared. And so I think that was me is that I never said,

Chelsea Myers (06:06)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (06:15)
If you make me have kids, I'll leave. But it was a, am so terrified that I'm afraid to say, I can't do this. I don't want to do this. And so I just kind of went along again, went along for the ride.

Chelsea Myers (06:25)
Yeah. Yeah. And like checking the boxes almost. Yeah. That's so that's such an interesting way to put it too. My mom brain just fried for a second. It's usually doesn't happen this early. Seriously, like it usually doesn't derail this quick. so when did that shift for you? Like, did you guys have a conversation? Was it pre planned? Was it or did it just happen?

Amanda Curry (06:34)
Spur! Yeah.

In the infinite wisdom of my partner, he was like, could feel it. And he knew that, again, since he had been with me for four or five years, he knew I cannot make her do anything. I cannot push her towards anything. And so he lightly said, hey, we're younger. Let's give it a five, let's give it five years. Let's just give it five years. And like the plan will be to start having kids at five years. Okay, cool. Perfect. I'm 22. I'm like, see you in five years, bro.

Chelsea Myers (07:15)
Hahaha

Amanda Curry (07:15)
And then

it got to be five and a half years. And he was like, hey, so remember that conversation we had? And so again, he had to revisit it and had to lovingly and gently be like, hey, this is okay. Like kind of like gently hurting me. Like, hey, we're gonna turn now, you know? And so yeah, that kind of started the journey of...

having kids and we had a little bit of trouble initially having kids. And yeah, that bought me a little bit of time, but it also ushered in the shadow of something that I have no control over and I am not quote unquote good at it. My body is not responding the way that it's supposed to. And so that was almost this like foreshadowing of like.

Chelsea Myers (07:53)
Hmm.

Amanda Curry (08:00)
You have no idea what is about to be open to you. And yeah, that really, really was kind of the catalyst for what continued to transpire in the next five to six years.

Chelsea Myers (08:04)
Yeah.

Yeah. Jumping back just a tiny bit, because now I remember what I was going to ask you. What was it that was kind of holding you back before that or were you just content? Like, yeah, I don't need this in my life.

Amanda Curry (08:25)
a wounding

an experience. I was like, I'm, I'm not prepared to do that. I don't know how to do that. I don't want to do that. I don't want to impose my lack or shortcomings onto some innocent being. Full stop. I would, I think I probably in so many words said that or David just knew from what he had seen and experienced

Chelsea Myers (08:28)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Amanda Curry (08:47)
And again, it wasn't from a place of I won't touch that. It's that I had never been shown or given a light of like, this is how you tackle that. Because I'm not afraid of like, you tell me I can't do something. ⁓ girl, girl, just watch out. But no one had ever offered that like, if you want to address this, this is how you would do that. Like I had a fricking TSA pre-check clear pass in therapy. Like I was the girl that was like, yep.

Chelsea Myers (08:57)
Mm.

Amanda Curry (09:14)
I've been here before for like 10 years. And like none of that, this personal development, the self-help, the multi-level marketing companies like that were, you know, supportive in your personal development. None of that was touching it. I was coming back again and again and again and again again to the same limiting beliefs, the same patterns, the same projection. And I was like, well, apparently I'm just broken. And so I can't have kids because I'm doing all the things. And it's just, it just didn't work out for me. That's kind of what I had like.

Chelsea Myers (09:17)
you

Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (09:43)
sold myself.

Chelsea Myers (09:45)
Yeah, yeah. And that's a really harmful narrative to when you're hearing it from your own voice. I mean, it's always harmful when you're hearing it from others as well, but when your own voice is telling you, I'm not good enough.

Amanda Curry (09:57)
Yeah.

Yeah. And it wasn't really, it was one of those things, this is where it's really interesting. I rebelled so hard into the collapse and the woe is me and there's something wrong with me, quote unquote, that I was just like, yep, I've actually done it all. And it's just, it's just not for me. You know, like I had risen above an ego to be like, I'm not going to sit here and cry about it. I've done the work. It's just not for me. And that again is a place of like guarding and protection.

Chelsea Myers (10:18)
Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (10:24)
And I didn't know until I knew that that's what that was. So yeah, I was kind of flying through life being like, yeah, I mean, this is why I'm having fertility issues, just not meant to be doing all the things I'm supposed to. Yet there was this like inner boil. And so what I was saying was not actually energetically what was matching that. And so was, yeah, yeah, quite the journey. Absolutely. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Chelsea Myers (10:33)
Yeah.

Yeah, it's self preservation. It's a defense mechanism for sure.

So take us through that journey when obviously, like you said, it took you a little while. It wasn't easy. What was the experience like when you finally did get pregnant and you were like, okay, maybe I can do this, I guess.

Amanda Curry (11:01)
Yeah,

yeah, yeah. So, and I say this, I say this very lightly. I don't want to minimize what we experience, but in the vast majority of what people are experiencing now with infertility, was nothing. I took a couple of medications. We were really diligent about ultrasounds and when I was ovulating and then we did the thing at home and it worked, but it took a little bit of extra oomph. But yeah, I think we were so swept up in the like, I achieved it.

And we have to keep it secret for a little while. You know, like, I don't think I even had the pause or the thought to be like, my gosh, I'm gonna be a mom. It was like one more thing to conquer. One more thing to like do and achieve. And how can I fit this in my life? Because nothing was changing. I mean, I wasn't like drinking anymore. But like, I was still working out five days a week, six days a week. I was still working full time. I was like, I was doing the thing almost again in that mindset of like,

Chelsea Myers (11:28)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (11:54)
grooving that I can do it all. And I think that things started to trickle in a little bit about when people would send us things or and I started to get these little pings in my heart space where I was like, what is that? Shut that down. We're not going to feel that. And so again, there's these little bitty like catalysts that brought me to my knees eventually that I can see now were the little bitty bits of crumbs that, you know, God, the universe, whoever.

Chelsea Myers (12:07)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (12:21)
was putting in my path to be like, again, giving you little apps on this little tasters and for you to realize what there is that's going to be required of you and that you're going to get to feel in this whole process.

Chelsea Myers (12:34)
Yeah, yeah. So much of that resonates with me personally. I'm curious too, like, do you feel like you got to enjoy pregnancy at all?

Amanda Curry (12:45)
Like I said, I was not that girl that was being like, I mean, I remember being tired and I remember being a little bit nauseous, but we did a Bradley Method birthing class. I had all of the sheets. I was tracking what I was eating to make sure I was getting enough protein and greens. I I was this poster child of ridiculous pregnancy, doing all of the CrossFit workouts I had been doing before. I mean, obviously modifying in...

Chelsea Myers (12:52)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (13:13)
second trimester and third, but like, I remember I was back squatting like 160 with Christopher and I was like working out two days before I went into labor. Like, so again, it wasn't, none of that I feel like was dangerous. Like I wasn't putting myself in danger, but I was operating at a very high level. And now I realize like that is the gift in that is that it got me through in some sort of semblance of sanity. But I also now realize I don't have to.

Chelsea Myers (13:31)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (13:40)
be operating in that high of a level to also experience presence and peace and really just the things that I want to feel. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (13:49)
Yeah, and it's

almost like exactly how you explained before how you explaining your life like you were just kind of in it. Like you weren't really living in the experience. You're just like, I'm pregnant and life goes on. Like, and I'm going to do all of these things.

Amanda Curry (14:02)
Yeah, a thousand

percent. Because I wasn't connecting to, I'm not one of those people that like connects to something unless it's in front of me. That's babies or people. I mean, we're connecting now, but like, you know what I mean? And it's kind of an out of sight, out of mind, which for some women are like, what are you talking about? I don't even identify with that. This is like a being, this is like my person. And I'm like, again, like it was literally as if you've been given a task, almost like that high school, you have this egg, you are like going to keep.

Chelsea Myers (14:09)
Yeah. Yeah.

Amanda Curry (14:30)
up with it, you're not gonna let it crack and you're gonna get an A at the end. And I was like, yeah, I'm gonna, this is gonna be amazing. I'm gonna get an A plus in this, you know? So, you know, very mechanical.

Chelsea Myers (14:36)
Yeah.

Yeah, but that makes sense that like with everything that you're saying that that follows the same pattern. comes time for baby to make his appearance. What was that like? Cause I'm sure that was a big, that all of a sudden here he is.

Amanda Curry (14:52)
⁓ yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. And I think that that was the, that was the genesis of the, breaking open without me even knowing. It was probably the first somatic experience that I was actually aware of now or present to. we had a midwife and we had our kids at home. again, now seeing all of the through lines, like I, again, I told you, I was entrenched in like,

Western medicine mindset, what everybody else was doing, expectations, whatever. And I had this intuitive nudge. had this vision. I don't even think I was pregnant yet. And I envisioned holding my kid in my sleigh bed that we had at our old house. And I was like, that's weird. That's interesting. Why would I picture that so vividly? And again, I trusted my intuition, again, at that time. Did not know what that was. Thought I was just seeing visions, which is weird for me at that time. And...

started to put one foot in front of the other and get these callings of like, I'm just going to be curious about something. And that's the only reason why we had a midwife was because I was a healthy individual and we really clicked with the midwife and the nurse that was operating. had a backup OB that we, like everything was in line and yet I was starting to evolve into this person that could trust something that she needed and wanted. And so was, that was a little bit, again, it wasn't

Chelsea Myers (16:09)
Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (16:11)
allowing myself to be really present to the power of that. But seeing that now, was like, ooh, wow. So fast forward. He was due Christmas Eve. My water boat broke that night, Christmas Eve. And so I'm like messaging, or David is messaging our midwife, 5 a.m. Christmas Day. And he came at 11.08 Christmas Day. So relatively short birth.

Chelsea Myers (16:24)
Wow.

Amanda Curry (16:36)
The only thing that I'll share about that is one, someone that's a huge planner. I did nothing that I planned. was, it was completely silent. Do not touch me. Do not talk to me. Um, there's a lot of interesting like visions and the way that I experienced that, that I, I now see as God, spirit guides taking me through that experience. But the biggest thing that I will always be with me is when I finally birthed him, I.

could not stop, it wasn't screaming, but I could not stop vocalizing. I could not stop. I was just crying, but crying to a point where I was like, I don't even want to do it in the microphone because the listeners will be like, my God, stop it. But it was this vocalization where something had opened up and needed to run through me. And again, for some of your listeners, this may feel like very esoteric and very like, what the hell is she talking about? But it was the first time that I think that that type of

power, also that type of hurt, emotional, energetic, physical, all was like married into one and was allowed to exit out of me because I had held on to experiences in my past up until that point where you just couldn't any longer. And I remember my midwife was like, Amanda, he's here. You don't have to yell anymore. And I like I didn't even I wasn't even present to the fact that I was doing what I was doing. And

Chelsea Myers (17:44)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (18:02)
She was just like, she just like put a hand on my chest or my shoulder and she was like, you're safe, you're okay. Like he's right here. And it was like until then, like it just snapped and I was like, wait, he is and I am and we are, okay, yeah. And so again, like that in hindsight was a really, really powerful beginning to a new chapter.

Chelsea Myers (18:22)
Yeah. So we talk a lot about how when you have a baby and it doesn't matter if it's your first, your second, or your third, you're not only birthing that child, you're birthing a new version of yourself. And what a powerful vocal manifestation of that. You birthed your son and then you were also releasing so much that had been pent up and you didn't even realize you were doing it.

Amanda Curry (18:35)
Yes.

Yeah. No,

no. And it didn't, it didn't, it happened again with my daughter as well, because this journey didn't start until she was about two and a half and he was five. So again, like it was, it was almost as if like God knew like I've got to just give her this little, just like David, like I have to drop these things slowly into her awareness because I'm going to, I'm a just ruin her if we, if we give it to her all at once, you know? ⁓ but yeah, that was very much it. And I don't remember

Chelsea Myers (18:53)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Amanda Curry (19:17)
At one time I remembered what I kept saying, but it was very much an embodiment of something has been cracked open and is now running through me, finally allowed to flow through me.

Chelsea Myers (19:27)
Yeah.

I'm curious how that impacted those first, they call it the golden hour. I never really got to experience that. like, did that affect those first few hours, those first few days? Like, or were you able to once the midwife was like, you're safe, you're here, he's here. Were you able to drop back in and connect?

Amanda Curry (19:52)
you know, again, I think that I was so compartmentalized in that moment is that like, I noticed that, and then it's like, we had to get to work. Like, okay, we got to get you cleaned up. Okay. We got to, we got to do a little bit of sewing up. We got to go get you in the shower. It was like presence. What the hell was that? It's back to work. You know, so I didn't, I didn't stay with it for a really long time. I do remember, you know, again, like feeling those like surges of like emotion.

Chelsea Myers (19:59)
Mm.

Amanda Curry (20:17)
and also a little bit of terror where I was like, you guys have been here for like two hours after the baby's born. Like you're leaving, you're coming back when? Tomorrow? We're, we're in charge. okay. You know, like there was a little bit of that that took over with my husband and I. And again, it was, it was fine. And we knew that we could have called them whenever we needed it, but it was like, it's, it's go time in a completely different way. And again, as parents, what do you do? You stuff your needs and you

Chelsea Myers (20:29)
Yeah!

Amanda Curry (20:43)
know, stuff was present for you and you take care of the thing that's in front of you. And so I don't necessarily like blame or shame myself for that, for not staying in the bubble of like, what is this? But yeah, I think I've been able to have a lot more access to that retrospectively than in the moment.

Chelsea Myers (20:57)
that makes total sense. I'm just, yeah, you explained, I'm so glad, like you said, that I let you introduce yourself because it's all fitting so perfectly in this story of your journey. Like this type A list, like this is a task, I'm going to do it and it's gonna get done the best. I'm going to do it the best way that I can. And emotion may not necessarily play a part in that.

Amanda Curry (21:22)
Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (21:24)
so talk to me about what we call the fourth trimester. Talk to me about those first few weeks with, yeah, I know. So listeners, that was the very, the very audible eye roll. Talk to me about what that transition was like, because like you said, like when you were pregnant, you didn't necessarily have a connection, but now here he was, here he is, and you got a job to do.

Amanda Curry (21:35)
Yes, yes.

Yeah, yeah,

yeah. Again, I'm gonna be honest, because I have no shame in anything that I've experienced. I feel like that there were moments, like little glimmers of connection, but again, he was a task for me to take care of and do. So like, did I love like waking up and or having moments where I was like, you know, getting a chest snap?

Chelsea Myers (22:01)
Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (22:10)
Like, of course, like, yeah, there were, there were times when that would glimmer in, but I'm trying to think now there was not this like, you know, Simba moment where I'm like holding him up overhead. can't believe that you're here. I am one that really, really struggles with lack of sleep. And so with the components of lack of sleep, we had a little bit of like, you know, latching issues, the normal kind of stuff that some people go through. Um, but yeah, I think I was just in autopilot and then I remember.

Chelsea Myers (22:25)
Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (22:40)
kind of fast forwarding to, it was literally six months of the day. I remember I was driving down the main street that we drive to go back to our house. He was born on the 25th. It was six months. So was like June 25th. And I remember feeling this enormous surge of heat and what I now know to be as rage as I'm like arm on the steering wheel, arm in the paci of his mouth, like trying to hold that. And I remember looking at

It's as if it happened yesterday, looking at the clock with the date next to it and being like, it's been six months and feeling that shift like that and being like, this is something new and I have no idea what this is, but it's scaring me just a little bit. so again, like I went back to the gym a month after I had him and started doing light stuff. it was again, until I fully surrendered to the healing work that I experienced in 2020.

We just were like, business as usual, let's just get this done. So nothing was hugely traumatic or going down just yet in those first six months. It was, I would say, pretty typical, but it was only opening myself up to further the dysfunction that was just ahead of that.

Chelsea Myers (23:56)
Right, and you like briefly mentioned it, like you didn't even start to sort of realize what any of this was until after your second was born, is that true?

Amanda Curry (24:06)
Yeah, and I think that came from like the deeper healing work that I was doing. Like I knew that I was angry. My like antepartum like before I had my second was horrific. Like the emotions that I was feeling, I felt like a crazy person. Like I literally felt like I would, the undoing was happening because of all the hormones prior to. And then yeah, like, I mean, it was, it was really, really tough. Like I would say,

Chelsea Myers (24:09)
Yeah.

Mm.

Amanda Curry (24:32)
I remember just like sitting on my bed, like wailing in tears because I just was not the person that I wanted to be. I didn't feel the things that I felt like I should. I was drowning in shame and guilt. And you know, my husband was just there like holding it all up and I didn't want that either, you know? So it was definitely like this compounding effect of like, of doing it, I'm doing it, I'm doing it. And then I'm pretending like I'm doing it, but I'm, I'm not really doing it, you know?

Chelsea Myers (24:59)
sort of going back a little bit again, because that was sort of your experience and because with your first, like you were just doing it, you were doing the thing. how did the decision come about to have another? Was it some... Okay.

Amanda Curry (25:11)
again, like this, if you're not sensing a pattern, like it was just because it was what it was expected. It was just because

we're going to have another, we're not going to have probably more than that, but we're going to have to. And then it was like, you know, we had had a miscarriage in between the two, which is, was an interesting experience to go through. And essentially we had said, because we had had the fertility issues before, I was like, I'm not going on birth control that can like F all the way off.

Chelsea Myers (25:22)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (25:38)
because that was part of the reason why we got into the situation that we got into previously. And so we were just like, we're just gonna trust that whenever we're supposed to, we will. And then after we're done, we'll take care of that. So yeah, we'd had the miscarriage in between Christopher and Kennedy. then, yeah, Kennedy was gonna come about two and a half years after Christopher was born. And we were like, okay, cool. Like, you know, Google, what's the best age to have la la. So, you know, it was not some sort of...

Chelsea Myers (25:38)
Yeah.

Hahaha

Hahaha!

Amanda Curry (26:06)
beautifully emotional heartfelt plan. It was just like, this is what we're doing. Yeah. Yes.

Chelsea Myers (26:10)
this is what's next. This is the checklist.

So yeah, let's talk about it a little bit. So you never really, really got into what was going on with your first pregnancy and what was going on with motherhood the first time around. And now you're deciding to do it all over again. I'm also curious if you were aware of...

P.M.A.D.s of postpartum depression or perinatal depression, you were aware of those beforehand.

Amanda Curry (26:38)
yeah, I

had my placenta encapsulated. I was also terrified. That was part of having the kids being terrified of what I was gonna feel like afterwards. This is not like earth shattering new information. I was like, yeah, this is probably gonna happen. And I think that's when I looked at the clock and saw, wow, like I've been keeping things together for six months and this is where it turns. I remember just like feeling that. And don't get me wrong, like I had started on prescription meds at six months after my first and I had...

Chelsea Myers (26:42)
yeah.

Okay.

Yeah.

Amanda Curry (27:05)
been going to therapy, I had been seeing a mentor through the church. It wasn't like I was just sitting there being like, this is just the way that it is. was again, continuing to like, what am I supposed to be doing? I continued working out at a high level, bringing my kids to the gym five to six days a week, which is just wild. I was doing whatever I knew in the past that had quote unquote worked, and I'd continue to just try to apply it to my daily life as it was.

Chelsea Myers (27:22)
Yeah.

Yeah. So you were taking all the steps. knew you had an idea of what could be and maybe what was happening. Do you feel like part of you was doing that thing like you mentioned before, just like pushing it into a box? Like, I've got it. Yeah.

Amanda Curry (27:49)
yeah, shoving it down. I'm almost like,

I'm just gonna be really honest, like it's all kind of coming up right now is that I'm just like how much.

empathy I have for her and how much like, damn, like you were so lost, like so lost, and had never been given the tools and had an incredibly supportive partner. But like, again, that's where it seems so clear is like, no one had ever modeled to me any of the things that I actually needed to slow the f down to ask for help to just feel the feel like

Chelsea Myers (28:02)
Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (28:25)
So many moms now would just benefit and they would go from maybe a 10 to a seven in the, know, feelings department or the overwhelmed department just by doing those things. But that wasn't available to me because I didn't believe that that would work or that that was safe. And so it's just like, I don't allow myself to connect back to those scenes and those seasons very often because I see now like how much that pain was just.

Chelsea Myers (28:39)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (28:50)
stuffed and compressed and like just pushed down for sure.

Chelsea Myers (28:54)
Yeah.

You mentioned that your partner was super supportive. Did you have any support outside of that? said like you were going to, I mean, you were going to your church, you were doing things like that, but in terms of like a support network or a village, we like to use that term, which doesn't actually exist here in the U.S. Did you have any of that?

Amanda Curry (29:13)
Yeah.

I mean, we had a huge group of CrossFit friends. Everything was available to me, but I was keeping it at arm's length. It was all superficial. Because again, what did I learn? Don't let people in. People are unsafe. People will let you down. People won't love you if they really know who you are. It didn't matter. This is the part of I love community, and I love, this is something that I'm continuing to lean into, the community piece. But if you're not right, you can't receive the gift of community.

Chelsea Myers (29:22)
Okay.

Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (29:44)
And I mean, right, as in like, if your heart can't be open, if it feels unsafe, if you have wounding and unlearning to do, like you can have the greatest community. I did have a great community. I still have a great community. I'm still continuing to be called forward in the, I hate this word, but like submission to that, like the opening to that, the leaning into that. Yes.

Chelsea Myers (29:44)
Mm-hmm.

or acceptance, like just acceptance.

Yeah, rather than submission, maybe. Yeah. So just for because I like, because everybody experiences this differently, and everything's going to resonate with someone in a different way. What you talked about the rage, you talked about the anger, you talked about the depression. How did that manifest for you? What did it look like?

Amanda Curry (30:08)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Um, now I know that I was having a lot of like sensation based symptoms, like I would feel the biggest, uh, just surges of like heat and tension, usually in my upper half. So it would like start in my chest, up into my face, into my arms. And it would be all that I could have to just like stifle it back down. Um, I also found that I'm an open book. like,

Chelsea Myers (30:46)
Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (30:52)
my oldest and even my youngest, when they would cry or when they would not go down for their nap, you saw the worst version of me. Like, no, did I ever abuse them? Of course not. But like there were the energy behind my presence was like, you are a nuisance, you are a bother, you are like keeping me from one of my coping strategies, which is sleeping and napping, and I am angry about it. And so like, yeah, mean, reactivity with them.

Chelsea Myers (31:14)
Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (31:20)
projection on my husband, everything always being his fault, not feeling like I have enough support, being mad about not having enough support even though I wouldn't allow anybody to support me, overworking, overdoing, anything that could curb me spouting off and showing these rageful sides to anybody else, that's what I was doing. And again, I think that I started to feel some of that collapse in between.

Chelsea Myers (31:42)
Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (31:46)
Christopher and Kennedy when I was like just crying all the time. That was probably one of the only times that I felt true. You if you follow the polyvagal theory, like I was in that ventral vagal like state of just nothingness of like, I was not there. I mean, David could even tell that like, I'm seeing through you. Like there's nothing there. So yeah, that was my journey. And now even with the work on board.

Chelsea Myers (31:59)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (32:09)
I still, it's one of my gifts. Like I can turn on that fire in a second, but I know how to harness it. I know how to move it. And I know when and where is appropriate and not appropriate to do it. So it's not as if mom rage has gone away from me. ⁓ like that again, it's part of me, but I get to use that in a really, really healthy way now.

Chelsea Myers (32:22)
Yeah.

Yeah, what was the catalyst for that? What was the catalyst for the switch when it came to be like, okay, maybe I need to explore this deeper or I have to face whatever this is head on.

Amanda Curry (32:40)
Yeah. And again, in 2020, it was this and even leading up to that 2018 after I had Kennedy, it was like, I started to hear this whisper of like, there's something else out there. Just keep going. There's something else out there. Just keep going. And I kept just hearing that voice. And again, putting one foot in front of the other. And then it wasn't until 2019 that I was walking down the street, listening to a CrossFit podcast. And my now mentor was on that platform talking about

inner child healing. And I was like, okay, I'm sorry, I thought we were talking about like protein powders and barbell cycling and, you know, carb whatevering and she opened me up to this world of like, no one had ever in all the years of therapy, talked about any sort of like being in your body, somatic work, inner child healing, reparenting. I was like, what? I've just been like projecting my hurt and blame onto my parents as well. And really just like re

Chelsea Myers (33:09)
Mm.

Hahaha

Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (33:36)
not re-traumatizing myself, but rehashing the same stories over and over again in the same hurts and not actually moving through it. And so through that work, the crumbling of all of the facade and the walls and the guarding allowed me to create a new foundation that allowed that anger and that fire to be there, but in a much more grounded and present way.

Chelsea Myers (34:00)
Inner child work is something that I think is still, you said it earlier, like some of your listeners might think like, okay, like put your crystals away or whatever, but like, it's something that for so many of us, I'm not gonna, I never assume age, but I fall into the elder millennial group. And for a lot of us, we are realizing now in our late thirties, early forties,

that we have a lot of shit to sort through and inner child work to go through and reparenting and so it's so interesting the way that you came into that though was through this CrossFit podcast.

Amanda Curry (34:26)
Yes.

yeah, yeah, it's why. And I think that that's, you

know, that's where you get to laugh at that shit is be like, yeah, God, okay, got it. That's fun. Like really? Like this is the only thing that's going to get her, ⁓ her like, we know that she's going to be listening to this podcast. So let's just drop this in here, you know? and I, I love that you're bringing up that point. I actually brought it up in a previous podcast that I was on with someone else is this, you're right. This is the first generation that we are parenting while also learning to reparent ourselves. And there are certain

Chelsea Myers (34:39)
Yeah.

yeah yes thank you

Amanda Curry (35:03)
non-negotiables that are now required of us to be able to do that in a really healthy, grounded way. And it is no joke. it is, you are, my mentor says, healing is like slaying a dragon in a forest. It's not like walking on a sidewalk on a sunny day. And so imagining, you know, slaying these dragons within while also attempting to be with the dragon that is your two-year-old that will not get dressed, you know?

Chelsea Myers (35:11)
Mm-mm.

Yes!

Amanda Curry (35:30)
It's

like, no wonder your nervous system is overwhelmed, right? And that's why I think so many women, mean, again, hundreds of women that I've talked to in DMs on Instagram are like, I need something different. And this is not to shit on traditional therapy. It's not to shit on books or like Tony Robbins, any of that stuff. Like that stuff gets to be here. And we are learning that we cannot think ourselves into being a present parent. We cannot think ourselves away from the rage and the anger and the frustration that we have.

Chelsea Myers (35:56)
Mm-mm.

Amanda Curry (35:59)
because the other component to this is that, and you alluded to this earlier, is the lack of community. Unless you are going to drop your life and go to a small village in Central America or to Europe or to Spain or wherever and completely take up the culture that is there, it is likely that you are going to find that the community is not what it is in other places. And so we can either

sit here in the States and we can be frustrated and angry about it, or we can equip ourselves with things that are needed to be able to traverse that reality. And that is something that again has dropped into my awareness in this last week and that I am feeling really called to in the later half of this year to start a community group around mom rage and frustration because there is not spaces for it and there's so much shame around it.

that if that feels like a gift of mine that I'm like, yeah, bring it all. Like I'll hold it and we'll all be able to witness to it. Then why not start doing that? know? So it is so complex for us elder millennials. But it gets to be, right? Like too much is given, much is expected. been my whole life's work to be like, tell me I can't do that, right? I'm gonna find a way. And so I think that we have a lot of really, really empowered women that are now

Chelsea Myers (37:00)
Yeah.

You

Yes.

Amanda Curry (37:24)
reconnecting to their intuition, but also reconnecting to their power and being like, this is not okay. And I'm changing this. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (37:31)
Yes, yes, yeah.

And it's a beautiful thing to watch. And it's a complex thing to watch as well, because like you said, it's not easy. It's absolutely a battle. And I think that it's so encouraging and I'm so excited to hear that you're gonna be building this community as this year progresses, because that's kind of my whole thing with everyone that I talk about. It's like...

were promised these villages, they don't exist. So you have to build it yourself. And that sucks. Like I'm not saying like, I don't say it as a lecture. I don't say it as a, as a negative thing. It's more of an empowerment. Like you're not going to find it. You've got to build it.

Amanda Curry (38:00)
Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, or and sometimes just ask for it. Like in my breath work journey, we haven't even touched this, but like in my breath work journey, I came back from the retreat that I was initially a part of after the 90 day face melting that I got from my mentor and her program that she had. And I was like, I'm never going to be able to do breath work in my community. There's no one doing it like me or doing it like what I just experienced. And I will be damned if a week later, the movement gym that I was a part of was going to.

a breathwork session that then opened me up to my now breathwork mentor. again, ask and you shall receive. I hate to throw out these biblical quotes, but it's one of those things where I want people to take what you just said and not collapse into it's too hard, it's too much, a community has to look like this. A community can be like I've done where I've deepened my relationship and my connection with one particular friend. And I know, and she knows, that we can go back and forth on that.

Chelsea Myers (38:44)
Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (39:06)
It

can also look like virtual platform friends. You know what mean? Like your community and your tribe can look very different and it may look very different than what you imagined it to, but it's there as it's supposed to be for you. And one other part that I'll open up from a conversation that I had with a mom yesterday is that the other part is when you are aware and accepting that this community isn't there,

or not in the way you want it. It also opens up these wounds that like your mom or dad could be physically present. They could live in the same town as you, but they don't know and can't give you emotionally what you need because of what they haven't learned yet either. so it motherhood opens up this like I'm caring for this small child, but I still the inner one within wants to be mothered, wants to be cooked for, wants to be held, wants to be taken care of and seen and witnessed. And our parents don't have that capacity, a lot of them.

Chelsea Myers (39:46)
Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (40:01)
just don't. And so we have to be faced with that and the hurt and the grieving that goes with that, which again, know, compounded effect, like, already have this crying child, why do I then want to also feel the grief that could be present for me? So it's, we're not saying it's easy, but we're saying that it's definitely needed and very much worth it.

Chelsea Myers (40:17)
No.

Yeah, yeah. And I know that this is 100 % not about me, but like you keep bringing up the two year old, I currently have a two year old. I have a two year old and a nine year old. And a nine year old who's going through puberty. So it's basically like having two two year olds and re-parenting myself and I am just barely entering into inner child work. I came upon it in an unexpected way as well, not where I thought I would.

Amanda Curry (40:36)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (40:49)
And so yeah, when you're in those moments where everybody's screaming or everybody's crying and I'm overwhelmed and I'm overstimulated, but I was never given the tools to handle that. I'm learning those now along with my children, accepting that there's no shame in that. I'm not a bad mom. You're not a bad mom. But that, yeah, this experience is hard, but not impossible.

Amanda Curry (41:15)
Mm-hmm. Yep.

Chelsea Myers (41:15)
Non-impossible. And

it's kind of beautiful that we get to take this journey with our kids.

Amanda Curry (41:21)
because the thing that you don't realize, this is a long game. And so though you may have lost your shit on a Friday at 8.30, you also get to gift your kid the repair that maybe you never got to experience on Friday at 3.30. And you also get to model the lack of perfection that's needed. If I've had one mom, I've had 12 moms be like, but my mom did it all.

Yeah, great. And she was probably really amazing at stuffing it all down and putting on the happy face because that's what she learned. But what did you feel from her? You felt that she was lonely. You wondered why she felt so empty. It's because she was stuffing it or dissociating it. And so, yes, did she provide everything for you? Absolutely. But now you are feeling the effects of and maybe wanting to rebel against having to do it all.

and what was the cost of that.

Chelsea Myers (42:19)
Yeah, absolutely. I love that we're having this conversation too, because, and again, it's not fully focused on postpartum rage, but like a lot of it is, and it's one of the perinatal mood and anxiety disorders that isn't talked about enough, I don't think, because it's not that it never existed, but it wasn't necessarily as recognized. I'm not even going to say we all.

Many of us have heard of postpartum depression. Some of us have heard of postpartum anxiety. Now we're learning about postpartum and perinatal OCD. We're learning about postpartum and perinatal psychosis and rage and all of these things. And I think it's so important to talk about all of them and rage, especially because the guilt that comes along with that, maybe some of...

the hardest to deal with. And I'm saying that from a personal standpoint. I'm not sure how you feel. But like when I was experiencing postpartum anxiety and depression, I didn't have the capability to feel bad about how I was presenting myself. But when I'm overstimulated and I am mad and ragey and hot and not my regulated self, that guilt is felt deep.

Amanda Curry (43:21)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah, and it's based upon what you learned or what was modeled for mom and dad, but also culturally, societally. Don't be an angry mom, don't be an angry woman, don't express frustration, you're not allowed to feel that. And to not walk back, but to get back to one of the things that you shared about postpartum anxiety is I find that rage is a byproduct of the anxiety. And for me,

Chelsea Myers (43:34)
in a very different way.

Yep.

Amanda Curry (44:00)
and some people may resonate with this, is that you are either usually, whether it's depression or anxiety, you respond to that in either a collapse or hypo-activated state or a hyper-activated state. And so some people may collapse, which is what it sounds like that you did into the anxiety and the depression, where some people that hold this, why am I feeling this way? I shouldn't feel this way.

go into the upregulated of like turning inward towards self of like you're doing it wrong, there's something wrong with you. And so even in my postpartum, what I would imagine would have been considered anxiety and depression, rage was what came out for me, right? And so again, all of it are just coping strategies for trying to manage what is happening on a sensation level. And that is a lot of the work that we touch upon and sometimes have to stay on for weeks with clients is because you can have all of these awarenesses.

Chelsea Myers (44:37)
Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (44:52)
But if you cannot from a somatic level go through the second stage of healing, which is acceptance, like holding these sensations in your body, there's really no healing that can occur yet because you don't have the capacity, your system doesn't have the capacity to hold what's there. And so a lot of women, like we won't even necessarily get into like traditional somatic reparenting or inner child work yet because all we're doing is allowing their system to come online with the safety that is their sensations.

and just some somatic tracing, they can be like, wow, I feel so much more empowered. Like I'm not at a 10 all the time. I'm at like a five or a six because let's also be honest, hormonally, we want things to go away. Your hormones are all over the map for the first two years after like you've had a kid. So it's about triaging and supporting yourself through that, not numbing out from it. So I'm not saying, and I never say that to moms, that this is gonna like create your life to be sunshine and unicorns.

Chelsea Myers (45:32)
Yes. Yes. Yes.

Amanda Curry (45:49)
but it is going to give you the tools to be able to navigate the chaos both externally and also internally.

Chelsea Myers (45:56)
Yeah, that, yeah, so much of that resonates with me. And I'm so glad that you said the first two years, because there's such a misconception. And it's our culture with bounce back culture and whatnot. like, and everyone's like, six weeks, 12 weeks, like, no, your body really does not regulate. It doesn't even begin to regulate back to its baseline until two years postpartum. So if you're in it,

Amanda Curry (46:21)
Yeah. And how many of us are

having kids within that timeframe or already pregnant again? It's like, of course.

Chelsea Myers (46:25)
Right, right. Yeah, so

you're already working with the cards stacked against you. I'm so glad that you said that because yeah, the misconception is infuriating. I kind of feel like this is a great segue into what you're doing now. Like you briefly mentioned that you want to start a group for

moms with mom rage, but you're doing a lot of work. You're doing a lot of somatic work, inner child work, breath work. Tell me about those things and how you're seeing them help you and the women that you're working with.

Amanda Curry (46:59)
Yeah, so connecting with your breath, that was probably the first thing that I started to put out into the world because I wasn't yet completed or hadn't yet completed my certification for inner child healing and reparenting. And so that was something that I had gotten my level one certification for and that was so transformational with being able to access my heart space, being able to access emotions, but also being able to allow those to flow through me. And so breath work is one of the first things that, especially women that

have a little bit of a socioeconomic block or limitation for being able to access this type of work, that is something that I feel really, really empowered and called to have people step into first because whether it's in person where I live or in the virtual spaces, that is something that again can help to connect you back to what you're actually experiencing, give you tools to be able to hold that.

and give you this kind of, I call it the gateway drug to inner child healing because it's going to open you up in ways that you're like, I don't know what this is. I want to explore this more, blah, blah, blah. So that was really what came online first. And then, and I still do that once a month in person or virtually. again, that has been a great resource for me that I use very consistently and that I really suggest to my clients first starting out. And then yeah, the inner child one-on-one work.

that I do either in four, six or 12 month increments. And what's been really funny is that like, again, going back to the trusting your own intuition, there's all of these like business gurus out there and even my mentor, she has not yet had kids and you got to do weekly and you got to do it this way. And I'm like, show me another coach that is actually offering this type of work to moms and let me know if once a week for 90 minutes works for them. And so it's been this journey of like really

Chelsea Myers (48:48)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (48:50)
meeting women where they're at because this work is folded into an already very busy and full life, especially well, whether you're at home, caring for your kids or out in the world caring for your kids. This is something that like that flexibility and that fluidity is needed for these women. I tried to launch a group program back in the fall. That was 12 weeks, $1,500. The women were like, I want this and I'm telling you right now it's not feasible. So what did I do? I rolled it back.

Chelsea Myers (49:16)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (49:18)
we're launching again, it's shorter and it's cheaper. And like you have to meet women where they're at. It's like the community piece. It may not look like what you envisioned it or what business masterminds say that it has to be, but I am very passionate about this being available for all women, not the 1%, not those that are taking home greater than six figures, every single woman, whether it's the free master classes that I put out or these higher ticket one-on-one offerings, like it is available and should be available to everyone.

And then really the community piece is really what's coming online now. I felt in the fall this like shift of like, how are you going to make more of an impact? Not from a place of like, I need to be making more money, but like there's something more that you haven't tapped into both personally and professionally. And so again, like taking my hands off the wheel and just being like, guide me wherever I'm supposed to through a series of events, it really became clear to me that like I still had some things to work through with like the beliefs on community.

Chelsea Myers (50:16)
Yeah.

Amanda Curry (50:17)
And

also, what would that community look like and what would I offer to that community? I'm not about, it, but like, I'm not about just getting together to like chit chat and small talk. It's there, it gets to be there. But if we're meeting, if you're taking time out of your busy day as a mom, I want us to go deep and fast as long as like your system can hold that. And so I want it to be a space of community, not just to commune because even though that's needed in spaces.

Chelsea Myers (50:28)
Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (50:45)
I'm not the person to bring that out in the world. so mom rage, literally I have an oversized post-it note that I literally like went to town on, what's today, Friday, Wednesday after a talk with a new mom because it's needed. And it's like, how does this siphon into other courses? How does this siphon into a Ted talk? how to, like, and that is coming from a place of really fully completing what I experienced and what I now can like continue to be with and guide other women in. And so it feels,

so organic and so this is it. This is where I was supposed to like come full circle to until the next thing, you know, spurs me forward into maybe something different or something deeper. And so that's really how I'm supporting women, even dads. It's so sweet to have them too in the journey that is right now and just really giving women the permission to take their power back, to let it be hard, to feel the thing and to trust their intuition.

Chelsea Myers (51:26)
Yeah.

Yeah, there's so much that I love about that. I love that you're still utilizing that type A personality. like, yes, yes, you're still using that you but you're using it in a way that also honors your journey and honors where you came from and and the path that you took. And I always love the phrase like we love to see it.

Amanda Curry (51:45)
Yes, yes, we execute around here, girl. We execute. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (52:05)
But like, I'm not a fan of the term silver linings. Anybody who's listened to the podcast will know that I do not like the term silver linings. I personally don't believe that you went through what you went through so that you can be doing what you're doing now. But the ability and the drive to take what you went through and what you are going through and turn it towards serving others is one of the most beautiful and powerful things.

Amanda Curry (52:13)
Mm-hmm.

Chelsea Myers (52:32)
that we can do as humans. So that, yeah, that it just, It makes perfect sense. It's so on brand for you. You're like, okay, I'm working on me. How can I channel this so that we can help others work, like get through this too? And it also emphasizes that there is another side. It doesn't mean that, like you said, it's sunshine, rainbows and unicorns.

Amanda Curry (52:33)
Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

no.

Chelsea Myers (52:58)
but there is another side and the depth of the guilt and the shame and the sorrow and the despair is not forever.

Amanda Curry (53:05)
Absolutely. It's a season. That is one of my other phrases and mantras that I would come, I used to have really bad stomach pain growing up. Hmm, wonder what that was about. And I would always say to myself, even as a teenager, I will not always feel this way. I remember being in the bathroom. I will not always feel this way. I will not always feel this way. And I use that now because you're right. People need to hear, women need to hear that this is a season because when you're in it, it feels like a storm that you have no idea when it's going to end. And yeah, it just, it gets to be that.

Chelsea Myers (53:12)
Hahaha!

Amanda Curry (53:32)
But I think that there is like just a little tiny door opened to also making it light and funny. I was serious for so long in my healing and in what was happening to me and what had happened to me that now being able to have a co-facilitator that I used to work with and she would sing when she would get irritated. She would be like.

No one is listening to me right now and I want to get in the car. like, like things like that, things like when a child meets you in a tantrum and then you like model and mimic it and then they're like, what's mom doing? Like we are in it all day long. Why not add a little pattern interrupt that makes you laugh and smile and probably makes your kids smile too. That is a gift of my partner that he has utilized that I've started to try to harness more because this

Chelsea Myers (54:16)
Yes!

Amanda Curry (54:21)
this shit is hard enough. Might as well add a little bit of laughter and humor, whether it's dark or light, to the scenario, you know what I mean? So I think that that's the other permission that we get to give women too, is that, yeah, this work is deep and heavy, but it also can be really, really light. And you get to feel, even in the trenches of a nine and a two-year-old, to be able to drop them off, pick them up, whatever, and within your soul feel like,

Chelsea Myers (54:28)
Yes, yes, yeah.

Amanda Curry (54:50)
I am doing the best that I can right now. And like, it feels good to allow myself to feel that my best is enough, you know, even in the messiness.

Chelsea Myers (54:58)
Yes.

yes. That is the message. It's okay. So typically, like I'm bringing us full circle and typically, I wait until the end of the episode, I have two questions that I asked my guests that I will I pick one, I'll wait until a session's over and I'll pick one. And you've like, you've answered both of them already. So it seems silly. It seems silly. But I think I'll ask this one.

Amanda Curry (55:21)
perfect. Perfect.

Chelsea Myers (55:28)
just to drive the point home and maybe to hone in on just one thing. But like, what do you hope? If only one thing, if my listeners can only take one thing away from your story and your experience, what do you hope they take away?

Amanda Curry (55:46)
trusting your intuition, the whisper that you have, whatever that is. It could be as easy as like, go call the therapist right now. Like go get in to the office. It could also be as like edgy as like, you hate this job, walk away. It could be also as crunchy as like, this partner is not for you. You don't have to deal with this anymore.

Chelsea Myers (55:57)
Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (56:11)
It could be as like heart centered as like, he's trying to love you, just let him in. Like I believe wholeheartedly as much dialogue that's going on in our brain. There are these intuitive, very essence filled, truth filled statements, questions, dialogues that are happening and only a fraction of women are getting more curious about them or allowing them to take up more space in their life. Everything that has brought me to this point,

quitting my full-time job, my six-figure full-time job last June or June 23, starting this healing work, birthing my kid in a bed, all of that is because of this little whisper that I followed. And I cannot and I will not ever disregard that. And so we can get into like all of the complexities of the things that we've talked about today, but none of that can ever be.

Chelsea Myers (56:50)
Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Amanda Curry (57:07)
lived out or carried out if you're not really trusting that little whisper or maybe it's a yell now.

Chelsea Myers (57:14)
Yeah. The only thing that I am going to say just because of the demographic of listeners that I listen to is if you're having really scary thoughts and you're having thoughts that seem like they're your intuition that are telling you things that are a little scary, listen to the quieter voice in the background saying, this isn't me. Please. Because Amanda's message is absolutely beautiful and I agree 100%.

Amanda Curry (57:35)
Mm-hmm.

Chelsea Myers (57:41)
Trust your intuition, trust your gut. Some of my listeners are going to be experiencing certain mental health conditions that that little voice in their head is telling them things that aren't true and that aren't real. So listen deeper and reach out for help.

Amanda Curry (57:47)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah, yeah. And it's

very likely that this, the intuitive nudges, you will feel it in your heart space and you will have probably heard it before and it will feel different. Because I've had those intrusive thoughts. I have been, I won't say actively suicidal, but I have had those, what you're talking about. And this feels differently and it may feel scary for a different way because it's really what your heart wants, right?

Chelsea Myers (58:02)
Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Yes.

Amanda Curry (58:22)
And so yes, absolutely love that caveat. just, you know the difference as well. A thousand percent.

Chelsea Myers (58:28)
Mm Yes,

absolutely. Amanda, I have loved this. I this is like such a vibe. I'm not a type A personality, but like, my gosh, so much of what you talked about resonated with me. Where can my listeners find you if they would like to learn more about you and the work that you're doing?

Amanda Curry (58:34)
Me too.

Yeah, in this wild world, I've kept it simple. I'm mainly on Instagram, the Somatic DPT, traditionally trained as a PT. So our credentials are DPT, David D, Paul P, T, Thomas. I need to actually, you know, I was walking down the hallway yesterday somewhere, maybe it was at work, and I was like, I gotta change those to girls' names. Why are we using guys' names? That's so wild. Anyways, so the Somatic DPT, all of my links are there. I have a ton of free content there.

Chelsea Myers (59:00)
You

Right?

Amanda Curry (59:15)
I always will message new followers so you can expect a message from me whether you're to reach out to me or not. But yeah, that's really the most active way that I connect with people. Because yeah, this world is crazy enough and I have enough on my plate. I do not need a fancy website yet.

Chelsea Myers (59:31)
Yet. Yet. I love it. That will be linked in your show notes. So listeners, please check the show notes so that you can find out more about Amanda. And yeah, just thank you so much for your energy and for taking the time out of your Friday morning to meet with me.

Amanda Curry (59:46)
No, this was amazing. There's a reason why I scheduled this at 8 a.m. and it's because I knew that it was important and I love the work that you're putting out into the world. It's again, part of what we need more of and so I just applaud you for heeding your intuition and your nudge to step out into the world in this way.

Chelsea Myers (1:00:04)
Thank you so much.

Chelsea Myers (1:00:06)
Amanda, thank you so much for sharing your story with me and for the work you're doing to empower other parents, mothers especially. Your energy was very much appreciated on this Friday morning and I'm hoping I can carry it with me through the rest of my day. Listeners, please be sure to check the show notes to learn more about Amanda and all of the programs she's offering to help moms reclaim their power. You can keep up with us on Quiet Connection by following us on Facebook,

Instagram, Red Note, and Threads at Quiet Connection Podcast. You can also find us on Blue Sky at Quiet Connection Pod. You can help our community grow by leaving us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify and consider sharing our episodes on social media. Be sure to check out our Patreon or Buy Me a Coffee accounts to support our mission and get exclusive access to bonus episodes and other goodies.

To share your personal journey, can contact us through our website at quietconnectionpodcast.com or by email at quietconnectionppmh at gmail.com. Join us next time when another story is told and you realize you are not alone. I see you.


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