Surrender, TFMR, and Finding Beauty Within it All: Remembering Wilde - Foster’s Story

When Foster Wilson’s second pregnancy took a heartbreaking turn, she found herself facing an impossible decision; one that no parent ever imagines having to make. 

In this episode, Foster opens up about her journey through cesarean birth, loss, and healing. She shares how surrender became her lifeline, how she honored her son Wilde, and how that deep grief eventually led her toward her calling as a postpartum doula and storyteller.

This is a story about the courage to let go, the beauty found in heartbreak, and the quiet power of choosing compassion for yourself and others.

 Key Takeaways

• Postpartum grief exists for everyone, even in healthy pregnancies and births.
• The ability to make choices about your own body and pregnancy is a matter of humanity, not politics.
• Honoring loss can take many forms—naming, storytelling, art, or simply remembering.
• Surrender isn’t weakness; it’s the quiet strength that allows healing to begin.
• Deep grief can plant roots that help us connect more profoundly with others.

To learn more about Foster, visit her website or listen to her podcast!

This episode discusses topics that may be triggering for some individuals. Please check the show notes for more information and be mindful of your own mental health and comfort levels.

Visit our Patreon to help support our mission to normalize the conversation and end the stigma surrounding PMADs!

Transcript

Chelsea Myers (00:48)
Hello, today I'm here with Foster. Foster, how are you?

Foster Wilson (00:53)
I'm so great. Thanks, Chelsea, for having me on your show.

Chelsea Myers (00:56)
I am so excited to connect with you finally. I feel like I've been saying that a lot lately, but life has been life-ing for a lot of us. So I'm just really thankful to have you and I'm thankful to share some space with you today. I would absolutely love it if you could introduce yourself to my listeners and let us know who was Foster before Foster was a mom.

Foster Wilson (01:03)
It has been. Yeah. Yeah. I know.

Yeah, absolutely. Well, thank you for taking the time to chat with me today. ⁓ My name is Foster Wilson. am currently a postpartum doula and and mom, of course. But before I was a mom, I was at that time in my life. deep in the arts.

I was an actor and starting to be a filmmaker as well. And ⁓ I was very much a busy person, I will say. I ⁓ was a go, go, go. I would say I was in my masculine energy a lot. was very ⁓ someone who liked to accomplish a lot of things. was very driven, career driven, life driven, just like interested in. ⁓

accomplishing so much and getting really far in life. So I'd made a lot of big bold choices and big moves across the country and to new places and things ⁓ and I think you know in motherhood a lot of things shifted and slowed me down and in a ways in positive and negative ways right as there are two sides to everything. Yeah that's what I was before.

Chelsea Myers (02:27)
Yeah. And now, and

yeah, like you said, you're a postpartum doula now and you're doing a lot of work in that area, which is we love doulas. We always, I always talk about how like, ⁓ there's not a lot of, don't endorse things or we won't say that, but I say to everyone, find a doula, find a doula, find a postpartum doula, doulas. You guys are doing work that I can't even, I can't summarize in.

Foster Wilson (02:38)
Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Chelsea Myers (02:57)
a sentence. what you do for families is, I wish I had a doula. So that's just my...

Foster Wilson (02:58)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah. Thank you. Thank you for saying

that. I get chills when I hear that because I actually see it as such an honor to be able to be invited into people's homes and their spaces in such a vulnerable time. I think it's deeply, deeply personal work. It's ⁓ which we can get into it. There is grief in postpartum for everyone and it I'm

Every single time I have the honor of working with a family, I just, I just feel very grateful that they have chosen me to be in that space. And I think that if anyone who is looking for a doula, it's so important that you have a deep connection and that you really fit that person. No matter their experience, no matter how many births they've served, if they're doing birth or how many families they've served, do you connect with them? Do you feel safe opening up to them? Because that is really

the way that ⁓ you're going to be supported the best is if you trust that person.

Chelsea Myers (04:06)
Yeah, yeah. We could talk about doulas all day and doula work, but I want to talk about you and I want to talk about your journey because it's complex and there's lots of layers. Let's, I guess, let's start with one of the most mundane questions I will ask you today. Did you always envision yourself being a mother?

Foster Wilson (04:08)
Hehehehe.

Mm-hmm.

It's a great question. I really did. I knew it in theory when I was a kid and a teenager. I had always been a caretaker, a nanny, a babysitter in my teenage years. Nannying was what I did in college to support myself and the work that I did for up until about a year and a half, two years before I had my first child. I was working with children and

when I met the person who became the father of my children, I did know with that person, like, yes, this is who I want to have children with. And it became more concretized once I met him. This was definitely in our future. And we met quite young. ⁓ We were 19 at the time. And so we we did everything a bit faster than I would say or earlier than I would say a lot of my friends. We I live in New York. I live in L.A. now.

So a lot people had children much later in life. We were earlier to the game, I guess. I was 28 when I had my first child. So yeah, it definitely was something I knew I wanted. And I knew I needed a break from children for a little while before I had my own. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (05:41)
Yeah,

I can absolutely relate. And also validate to like the timeline kind of just becomes what it is, right? Like you just kind of, we have these grand plans and then things just happen the way they happen. So let's walk through that journey

Foster Wilson (05:51)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (06:02)
to your first pregnancy, talk to me a little bit about that experience.

Foster Wilson (06:07)
Yeah, my first pregnancy actually happened quite easily. Fortunately, we were, ⁓ we planned it. We, I think we got pregnant quite quickly and that pregnancy was really smooth for up until about week 36. So I was with a midwife. I had gone deep into learning about natural birth and home birth. And so I had a midwife. We intended to have a home birth with my first.

And I felt great. I loved being pregnant. I just was one of those people that had it on the quote unquote easier side at the time. ⁓ I wasn't too sick. was, you know, I really enjoyed that. And I was like I mentioned the first of all my friends to have a baby. So it was kind of new and that was exciting. And we got to week thirty six or so and found out that my baby was Breach.

Chelsea Myers (06:42)
You

Foster Wilson (07:04)
which we didn't know because we had been under midwifery model of care and the way she had felt the baby she really just thought baby was head down, but she wasn't. And so our first appointment with a backup OB had this ultrasound and was like kind of totally thrown by that. I spent a long time doing natural natruopathic work to try to, you know, spinning babies, try to turn her and aversion, which was really, really painful.

Chelsea Myers (07:15)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (07:34)
And aversion is a manual turning of the baby and she would rotate, rotate, rotate about a quarter of like a quarter of a clock and then pop right back into place where she wanted to be. So ⁓ that was kind of, were under this turmoil trying to figure out what to do and considering a home birth with a breech delivery, but maybe not feeling comfortable. And then I started to itch in my hands and my feet.

And I remember texting my midwife at 11 o'clock at night and thank goodness she replied right away and she said, that is not normal. You need to see your OB in the morning because what I ended up being diagnosed with was colostasis of the liver, which is a pretty rare condition. It manifests in this extreme itching, especially late at night, especially in the hands and the feet and it's very uncomfortable.

but they checked my bile acid levels and they were quite high. And so at this point we were 37 weeks or so and they said, baby's full term, we need to induce, you need to have this baby now because her life is gonna be at risk the later you go. And that was really hard because I knew at that point I cannot have an induction and a delivery of a breech baby vaginally. So the only way would be to have a cesarean. And I remember

Chelsea Myers (08:56)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (08:57)
grieving that with my midwife and her office and just really having to let go of all of my planned outcomes here and all the things I really wanted for myself. And of course, a cesarean for me was kind of last on the list. But we did go forward with that and had a very smooth cesarean birth with my first child. And she was 38 and a half weeks at that point, healthy, and things went pretty smoothly after that.

Chelsea Myers (09:27)
Yeah, it's still quite the transition. Yeah, that's a huge shift from what you had envisioned. And I don't even, like the immediate thought that comes to mind is like, well, thankfully it went smoothly, but that still does not take away from, like you said, like there is a grieving process of that. You grieve the birth that you wanted and that you expected. Did that impact?

Foster Wilson (09:28)
Yeah.

you

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (09:57)
those early days of transitioning into motherhood.

Foster Wilson (10:02)
From what I recall, ⁓ you know, it must have, but I do think I remember, what I remember so vividly is the moment that I was grieving, the really taking that time with my midwife for her to sit and honor and hold space for as long as we needed to grieve and her to really tell me, you need to grieve the loss of what you wanted. And she didn't let me gloss over it, you know?

Chelsea Myers (10:08)
Yeah.

Mmm.

Foster Wilson (10:31)
So I think that set me up for more of a quote unquote success, right? In postpartum, like it set me up better than had I just tried to kind of muscle my way. ⁓ at least we have modern medicine and all of those things are true. And I need to grieve the loss of what happened for me. And yeah, and the interesting thing was I had my placenta encapsulated and the doula that did that.

took a picture of it and she came to me and she said, look at this placenta. You actually had a vein on the outside of the placenta. And so if you had had a trial of labor, your baby could have kicked this and you could have bled out. And that, then I found that out within 24 hours of giving birth. And so I immediately had this shift of perspective of like, okay, everything sort of.

Chelsea Myers (11:15)
Wow.

Foster Wilson (11:25)
happened for the reason that it happened. And now I tell my daughter, like, you know, you saved my life by staying breech because you really, ⁓ you know, she loves that story. But yes, but I was no longer angry at the situation. I felt like so grateful that I had just let it surrender to the process.

Chelsea Myers (11:30)
You

Yeah, and that's something. I, again, like I don't do, I don't like to do a lot of research on my guests beforehand because I really, really like to get to know you in the moment. But there are certain aspects of your story that I know and a recurring theme for you is this surrender. And I know it's going to come up again. So

I don't want to feel like I'm hitting fast forward at all, like, just in terms of taking us along this journey. ⁓ so you had your first, you had the cesarean and you kind of were settling into matrescence with, with this surrender and this knowing of like, okay, this, this happened the way that it did and were right. And then when did you decide, okay, all right, I'm ready to do this again.

Foster Wilson (12:20)
Mm-hmm.

⁓

Chelsea Myers (12:34)
Let's try this again.

Foster Wilson (12:36)
I really couldn't. I knew we knew we wanted two children. I really couldn't feel like it was possible until I would say my daughter was about 18 months. I could start to see the forest for the trees like, there's a world in which she's slightly more independent and isn't so on top of me all the time. I I nursed her until she was two and a half. So she was.

We were very bonded. She needed a lot. You know, it's hard to imagine having a newborn when you also have someone who's so dependent on the parents of Irish twins. I'm like, I bow down to you and twins. But I, so really when she started to get a little bit more independent, 18 months, 20 months ⁓ approaching two we decided we were ready to try for a second. And this pregnancy also happened quickly.

Chelsea Myers (13:12)
You

Foster Wilson (13:29)
⁓ Maybe a couple months, I don't remember exactly, and we were pregnant again and very overjoyed, very happy. Our daughter was so healthy and beautiful and like we were, you there were definitely difficult moments of course, but we were excited. And this time I wanted to be with my midwife again. I wanted to try for a VBAC.

Kind of like I wanted a redo, you know, like I wanted to have the birth experience that I wanted. So we were under a midwifery model of care again and everything was going really well. We got to the 20 week ultrasound and this was the first ultrasound that we had had. And because it was the first ultrasound, you know, it's the anatomy scan of the baby. So the first ultrasound I went in and

You know, I had this moment where I thought something is maybe a little off, but maybe I'm just nervous because this is a big deal and I don't know. But I couldn't shake this. Like something is off in this on this day. And I went we went into the appointment and they started to do the radia.. You know, the scan technician, right, is doing the the ultrasound and is so quiet.

not making small talk, completely silent. We're looking, we're seeing a heartbeat. Everything looks good on our end. We're not like a little confused. And I said, is everything okay? And the technician said, the doctor will interpret the results. And my heart just sank. Then of course they have to finish the ultrasound. Doctor never comes in the room. We have to get all like clothes back on and everything. And they pull us into a side room.

which was a counseling room. And the counselor explained to us that our baby had something called fetal high drops, which manifested as fluid around the lungs and around the brain. And they showed us on the scan how there was all this black on the ultrasound, which was all liquid. And so essentially he was very swollen. And this was obviously, we don't know what this meant. He's got a heartbeat. don't, you know,

what does this mean? It felt very ⁓ dire and very heavy, but like no one really told us what was going to happen. So we had an amniocentesis. We ⁓

got the results of that, They said, it's neither viral nor chromosomal. And we were like, we didn't know that was an option. So essentially, they didn't know what was causing the swelling.

Chelsea Myers (16:11)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (16:17)
And we went to a long list or a long list of neonatologists and we were calling people in Chile and we were trying to get to the bottom of it. there was essentially it was just a very dark road. We probably went through four weeks of testing and uncertainty. And I remember at a certain point again, going to my midwife who just had become this, you know, maternal figure.

to me in this process. we were sitting outside of her little home and in the garden. I said, I, she said, I think it just sounds like you need clarity. And I said, yes, that was it. I just don't have clarity. It was sitting in this uncertainty for so long. Like, is this child going to live? Is he not? And what do we do? And eventually we ended up with a wonderful neonatologist at Children's Hospital in Los Angeles who said, we've

Chelsea Myers (16:57)
Mm-hmm.

Foster Wilson (17:15)
We've eliminated all of these options of what it could be. Down here at the bottom are these three things. There's no way to know for sure, but none of them are viable with life. And it was essentially a fatal diagnosis. He said it's the best case scenario is you make it to term, your baby is delivered, and he will live two to three weeks in the NICU. Best case scenario.

other choices, you things that could happen is he could pass on his own during this time. But also as you go on in this pregnancy, there's something called mirroring syndrome, and your body could mirror his body because he's so swollen, you could become swollen or develop preeclampsia, which is obviously very dangerous. And ⁓ it became clear that my life was a bit at risk here, had the potential to be more at risk.

Chelsea Myers (17:53)
Hmm?

Foster Wilson (18:10)
badly as I wanted this choice to be in someone else's hands. I wanted it to be one of my sons to make this choice for us. I wanted him to just pass peacefully. That was his journey. And it felt like I was being asked to play God or whatever you want to call it. I had too much control. I was being told, you can carry the term or you can terminate now. ⁓

Chelsea Myers (18:19)
Yeah. ⁓

Foster Wilson (18:39)
That was an excruciating decision to have to make. I was 24 weeks at the time. We did decide to terminate the pregnancy. In the state of California, it was written up as a fatal diagnosis and it was totally fine to, acceptable to go to the local hospital, have induction and delivery ⁓ covered by my insurance. am to this day so grateful that that was available to me because

different states at that time, in different states at this time, it would not have been... it would have been quite a difficult journey and probably an expensive journey and maybe with practitioners that weren't as qualified. So I just want to name that because it's really, really... I didn't have to suffer in that way and a lot of people do. ⁓

Chelsea Myers (19:30)
Yeah,

I'm thankful that you brought that up because that was going to be something that I brought up too. ⁓ In that A, like you're saying, you wanted this decision to be someone else's. I think that that is something that is so relatable. ⁓ And obviously no one, if you've never experienced loss or loss like this, it's not

Foster Wilson (19:55)
Thanks.

Chelsea Myers (19:59)
something that you can say like, yeah, I imagine that must have been so hard. but naming that naming that, like you had just hoped that he would make the decision for you and also acknowledging that you were also safe in making that choice at that time. And it's not like that for a lot of families because yeah, it compounds

Foster Wilson (20:03)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (20:28)
It compounds an already impossible decision.

Foster Wilson (20:31)
Yeah. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (20:33)
So I'm curious, like you and your partner, obviously you're going through all of these options. You're going through the options that are presented to you. How did you come to decide the path that you were going to take forward with your son?

Foster Wilson (20:42)
and

Yeah, the decision was twofold. What we said was the path of letting the path of letting him determine his own end date, which was could have been a pretty long path, looked like a lot of suffering. It looked like suffering for him. I wasn't really clear on how painful that would be. One of the things about fetal high drops, the reason why it's

Chelsea Myers (21:12)
Mm-hmm.

Foster Wilson (21:22)
⁓ so detrimental is because we didn't know at what point the fluid started building up and so it was pre-20 weeks which means the pressure on his lungs would have meant that his lungs didn't develop past maybe 16 weeks 18 weeks we don't know and i don't know what that kind of pain would have looked like for him and then i look at my daughter and to say the next few months are going to be just

all of it. We were going to grieve no matter what, but it was just going to be a heavy grieving period of really uncertainty and and then potentially hospital time and more confusion for her and just like a life of going back and forth to the hospital under what would have been the best case scenario. Right. So it looked like a lot of suffering for everybody involved. And I know now like it is in my is in my world purview to to

eliminate suffering, right? To reduce the amount of suffering. So I didn't know that at the time, but I really did feel like that was a choice to reduce suffering. then ⁓ the fact that my life was at risk, you know, I didn't really in the moment care so much about that, quite honestly. But my husband at the time, he held onto that so tightly. And he could really see an advantage point that I couldn't because I felt like it was

Chelsea Myers (22:40)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (22:50)
everything for my child, like everything for my child, right? But he held that vantage point of your life is at risk. I don't want anything to happen to you. Anything to happen to you, like how would that affect our daughter, of course, and me, right? All of those things. I didn't put that at the top of my list of reasons, but it was very strongly at the top of his list for reasons why to terminate. And the fact that we didn't have to have this conversation of

Chelsea Myers (23:01)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (23:18)
where would we have this done or how much would it cost because because of this privilege we had of living in the state of California at the time it it those became the two primary reasons yeah

Chelsea Myers (23:30)
Yeah. And

you, you brought up so many important points that I think a lot of people don't understand about this, like families who are forced into this decision. You have to think about children that you already have. You have to think about your future, their future, the suffering of you, the suffering of your child. not to take it to a, I don't even think it's a political thing. I think it's.

a moral thing, like the ability to have that choice is a privilege and I wish that it was a privilege that was afforded to everyone.

Foster Wilson (23:58)
Mm-hmm.

Right.

It's a matter of humanity.

Chelsea Myers (24:12)
Yes, yes, that's the word that I'm looking for.

And I'm not, like you said, you're an open book, but you can absolutely not and you do not have to answer any questions that I have if it's uncomfortable. But you able to sort of talk about what that process looked like once you made that decision? And how you were and like,

Foster Wilson (24:32)
Yeah, absolutely.

Chelsea Myers (24:36)
to take it a step further, I guess. Like, how did you navigate it while also honoring not only your life, but your son's life in the process?

Foster Wilson (24:48)
Yeah, I'm happy to talk about all of those details. I think it's really, really important if there's anyone who ends up listening to this and has to horrifically go through something like this. No one gets, no one walks you through it really. So the termination was scheduled. ⁓ It involved two parts. First, we went in for the termination and that looks like ⁓ a small medical office with a doctor.

Chelsea Myers (25:01)
Mm-mm.

Foster Wilson (25:15)
and they inject a needle in much like an amniocentesis, right? Where they're pulling fluid, they're actually going in and they're injecting something into, I believe, I'm a little fuzzy because of the grief that happened at the moment, but I believe they inject something, the medication, into the amniotic fluid. ⁓ If it goes into, I don't think it goes into like the baby itself. Correct me if I'm wrong at some point, you know, but I think that's what, it goes into the amniotic fluid and it's, I forget the name of the medicine, but there was a,

medicine that essentially at some point over the next 24 hours will stop his heart. So you do that appointment and then you go home and you come back in the next day for induction. And what I remember from that is this terrifying notion that at some point my son is going to pass and go from living to not living. And I don't know when that is. And I just remember my mom had come into town to take care of our toddler and

We were, I think, out to eat. And I remember being at the restaurant just like out of body, out of mind, just thinking constantly like, is now the moment that he's gone? Is now the moment? You know, I'm the only person that knows him, feels him. I was huge in my second pregnancy, right? I was like, this is, was very, ⁓ I could feel all his movements, right? And I just didn't know. And I now very well know the moment that it happened, but.

The next day we went in, check. So first they check the heartbeat to make sure there is not one, to make sure that he has passed. And then ⁓ they begin the induction. And I had not had an induction before, but that is a lengthy process, know, especially at 24 weeks, your body's not really ready to go into labor. can, inductions are lengthy, right? Foley balloons and waiting for, you know,

everything to open and then eventually pitocin. And I had made a decision at that time to not have an epidural because I wanted to feel the pain in my body the way that the pain in my heart was. I wanted it to match. I wanted a physical representation of grief on the outside. And I stand by that choice.

Chelsea Myers (27:34)
Hmm.

Foster Wilson (27:43)
because I think it helped me to feel. There was a point when we were at 24 weeks, okay? So there is a point before 24 weeks where this procedure might be a DNC and you would go under and it would be, you know, it would happen while you were asleep. because of the 24 weeks, 24 weeks is actually the cutoff really where they switch it over to now it's gonna be a vaginal delivery. But because he was so swollen,

Chelsea Myers (27:57)
Hmm.

Foster Wilson (28:12)
he was actually much heavier, bigger than he would have been at that time. So there was actually no choice in the matter. It was definitely gonna be a vaginal delivery. So I just say that because depending on where the gestation falls, it could be a different procedure. ⁓ This was in the labor and delivery ward at UCLA. ⁓ And we were fortunate enough to have just an incredible labor and delivery team.

They actually put a sign on the door that's kind of like a symbol for people coming into the room to know, don't walk in here with a happy face. Don't walk in here like, we're gonna have a baby today. you don't, be mindful of what's happening here. And it was really difficult because there were people in labor, you know, all around me and we could hear babies crying. And ⁓ it was very heavy, emotional and it's just heavy. It's the best word to describe it.

Chelsea Myers (28:49)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (29:08)
I had the full induction. At some point, I called my midwife because I felt like the pain was too much. I had endured too much and I was ready for an epidural, but I sort of felt like I needed her permission. I said, is it okay to get the epidural now? And she said, absolutely, of course. Like, yes, you can do anything you want.

Chelsea Myers (29:18)
Mm.

Yeah.

Foster Wilson (29:33)
And then she ended up coming and supporting us, kind of more like a doula because at that point, you we were under the obstetric care. I don't recall how long the labor and delivery took, but it was within the day. It was like before the end of the day. got in the morning and before midnight that day he was born. so a baby at that size should be like a pound, a pound and a half. He was three and a half pounds when he was born, which is to show you how

swollen he was. And it was, it was, I got to hold him. We both did. And it was a very strange experience, you know? And he, he just didn't look well. That was my first thought. He just really did. He looks very sick. Obviously he had passed, but like he looked like unwell. And so it kind of

Chelsea Myers (30:01)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Foster Wilson (30:27)
That part helped a little bit to be like, yeah, this baby was really sick and kind of confirmed just all of the cerebral information I had received from the doctors. And after about an hour or two, we decided to be done with, you know, holding him. And then you go through the process of, you know, what they would do at the hospitals, come in and talk to you about.

Are we doing cremation? Are we doing a burial? What are the, you know, all of that process, which just shocked both of us. I don't think we realized that was happening. But we did decide to cremate him and everything after that I couldn't deal with. I just made my husband deal with it of the like ashes and picking things up. And I just, it was too much for me. And you have to leave the hospital without a baby. ⁓

Chelsea Myers (31:19)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (31:25)
which is just so heavy and sad and almost, I felt almost a little embarrassed even though I knew that's what was happening, like to be leaving in this wheelchair but with all these like a box of baby things instead of a baby. And I, yeah, and it was a time after that of really weird going back into motherhood.

Chelsea Myers (31:43)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (31:53)
and trying to be present with my daughter, trying to figure out how I was gonna, as you said, honor him, we, ⁓ the ways in which we honored him were we gave him a name, his name is Wilde with an E, and we told everyone that was the way we honored him. We sent out cards ⁓ of the day that he passed and we framed it that we set him free.

Chelsea Myers (32:08)
Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Foster Wilson (32:22)
And we mailed those out like a birth announcement card. ⁓ I was very public on social media. I spoke my story. I continued to speak my story. That is the way that I honor him. by doing that, what ended up happening? I made that choice because there were so many people that knew I was pregnant. And I didn't know the way to bridge the gap between they know I was pregnant and now

Someday they're going to run into me at the grocery store and say, where's your baby? And that is hard for me, but that is really hard for them and awkward and uncomfortable. like, I didn't want to make anybody go through that. So I tried to tell as many people as possible, like a complete version of the story as I could share so that you do with that information what you what you'd like, you know, have your feelings or reach out or don't or protect yourself or whatever it is.

Chelsea Myers (32:56)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (33:20)
And a lot of people ended up coming out of the woodwork to talk to me and share with me a story of loss that they had had that was sort of not as known, a miscarriage or something that they had kept private. And I was equally as honored in those moments to receive those kinds of stories. ⁓

because they, for whatever reason, they felt safe sharing with me because I had shared my story. And I think as human beings, know, share, as you know, like sharing our stories is, is sometimes all we have.

Chelsea Myers (33:53)
so you might, as you were telling that you might've noticed my face, ⁓ get a little distracted and I totally didn't intend that, but this, again, I, I, ⁓ don't know if this will mean anything to you or not. This is the second time this has ever happened. ⁓ and the first time was with another loss mom. ⁓ my computer,

just completely malfunctioned, like to the point where I had, was trying to make it as little notice to you as possible. But what it's doing is it's pulling up this, a screen over and over again saying HP dragonfly, HP dragonfly, HP dragonfly. And dragonflies in my life have always been visitors who have passed.

Foster Wilson (34:27)
Mm-hmm.

Hmm.

Chelsea Myers (34:48)
And this has never happened. Like I told you, this isn't my usual setup, ⁓ but I've done lots of recordings on this laptop. And the only other time that this has happened was when I was talking to another loss mom. Yeah. I just, want, at first I wanted you to know, like I was listening to you, but I was also trying to not make my, let my computer crash. ⁓ But also just,

Foster Wilson (34:58)
Wow!

Yes! ⁓

Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (35:19)
Again, if that doesn't speak to you or that doesn't resonate with you, then that's a hundred percent fine. But for me that like drag dragonflies have always been visitors who have passed. so as you're wrapping up, like the feelings of coming out of the hospital and, and there's so many things I want to say too, but, and whether this stays in the episode or not.

Foster Wilson (35:31)
Wow.

Bye.

Chelsea Myers (35:44)
I can't count how many, there's like 20 tabs open right now that all just say HP Dragonfly. Yeah, so take that, however, it's crazy. Like I'm a little flabbergasted right now.

Foster Wilson (35:50)
Whoa.

Beautiful, yeah.

That's incredible. I love that. Thank you for sharing that with me. I appreciate that a lot.

Chelsea Myers (36:05)
Yeah, so there's

I'm so, I'm so glad. Well, and I also didn't want you to think like, what are they doing? Like, what are they looking at? ⁓ I was desperately like, don't crash, don't crash, don't crash. But then I noticed what it was. I was like, this is what it did. And this was a, this, it's not like my computer needs to update or anything. My, just did that. ⁓ yeah, it was about a month ago that I was talking to another loss mom and it did the exact same thing. ⁓ so yeah.

Foster Wilson (36:20)
Yeah.

Hmm.

Chelsea Myers (36:38)
That's what I want to highlight though in you sharing yours and Wilde's story. Things that really stuck out to me were one, like going back to the very beginning when you said you've always been this caretaker, you've always really, really cared deeply about caring for others and to hear you say.

Foster Wilson (36:42)
it

Chelsea Myers (37:06)
I know that's really hard for the person receiving the news. Just strikes me as like, my gosh, like even when you are navigating something that is beyond something that most of us can comprehend, you're still thinking of others. You're still thinking of how other people are gonna receive this information. I also love

Foster Wilson (37:09)
Hmm.

Mm.

Thank you.

Chelsea Myers (37:36)
that you celebrated or at least I don't maybe celebrated isn't the right word, but like you told the world about him and that he was here and and I think that that's just that's so beautiful and that probably went a long way in terms of the process of I don't want to say like the healing process because I don't know if you're ever fully healed from something like that.

Foster Wilson (37:37)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (38:06)
But I just think that's a really powerful decision that you made. Yeah.

Foster Wilson (38:11)
Hmm.

Yeah, thank

you. yes, I was going to say it. I was really, I was really almost desperate to find something positive out of the situation. And I want to caveat that by saying like, no one owes anyone their story, right? Like you do. Everybody does their own, has their own way of processing and

Chelsea Myers (38:34)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (38:40)
⁓ For whatever reason, the timing of how this happened and I was so far along, there wasn't an option really to hide it. ⁓ But I was really, really searching for something good. think in at my heart, I'm an optimist. And so I did have this, you know, I had this experience with my first where something went not according to plan, but then in the end, it was really the best thing that could have happened. Right. So although I'll never be like,

this was the right path ⁓ because I have this fork in the road of what could have been that will always be there. But I really needed to find some kind of ⁓ purpose for his life and his existence and for the heartbreak. And in doing that and kind of just like, was just kind of like spewing, not the right word, but I was just spreading this story and like messy, messy bits and pieces and ⁓

the number of connections that that has brought me to other people, ⁓ other birthing people, other people who've lost ⁓ at various stages, a lot of parents, and a lot of people's grief that have nothing to do with parenthood. Just I can touch, I have touched a very dark place in me, a very deep, dark place in the earth that I now have roots that go all the way down there.

And I feel like I have blossomed really beautifully out of that because my roots are so deep, but I can see when other people's roots are that deep. I know when those people who have suffered in the way that I did, I can tell right away. And maybe that's everybody actually on some level, but I can have that, I have access to that. And I can see, I can hold space right where they are. ⁓ Even if the feelings and the grief

Chelsea Myers (40:28)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (40:35)
present differently and the situations and the stories are different. Like, I see you is kind of how I feel. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (40:42)
Yeah. I mean, and that's, that's our tagline, right? Like you are not alone. I see you. And it's so powerful, especially in this area, in the area of loss, because it's not talked about. And, as we are recording this, there's this rule in podcasting, don't date your podcasts. I throw that out the window. I don't care. As we are recording this,

Foster Wilson (40:47)
Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (41:10)
It is pregnancy, infant and child loss awareness month. the point, I, somebody stated it so beautifully today and I'm going to completely butcher it, but it's this month and these days are not to, it's not like, go, I mean, yes, check on your friends, right? Check on your friends who have experienced loss, but it's to normalize these conversations.

Foster Wilson (41:31)
Sure.

Chelsea Myers (41:39)
because this is reality. And it's just like you're saying, like your roots go down so deep to this dark place, but you know that there are others out there who are looking to, who maybe don't have their roots planted so firmly and they need someone, right? They need someone to reach out and connect. And so you being so vulnerable, that is such a strength and that is such a gift. And I do, especially appreciate you.

Foster Wilson (41:54)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Chelsea Myers (42:09)
walking us through the process as because You're absolutely there's someone out there right now who's being faced with the same decision And we're not even gonna get into how complicated it probably is now ⁓ But they need to know what that looks like they need to know what it feels like they need to know what it sounds like they need to know what to expect Because just like you said like when you were trying to find

Foster Wilson (42:12)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (42:38)
out his diagnosis in the beginning, like, can you just, what do you mean? Tell me what this means. Right?

Foster Wilson (42:43)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's it's it. You feel so helpless at the time and there is such a deep ⁓ need to be connected with other people going through something similar. And I did not have it.

at that time. So unfortunately, you know, I had to, I then got to be that for other people in a beautiful way. And those people continue to find me over and over again through word of mouth and neighborhoods and moms and all of the things. ⁓ And, but sometimes I find that ends up being my path is like, no one's quite done this yet. So I'll just try, I'll just do this thing. That's really hard. I got forced into the situation and here I am.

Chelsea Myers (43:10)
Yeah.

Yeah. ⁓

Foster Wilson (43:27)
and then I'll figure it out and I'll tell other people and ⁓ yeah, thank you for saying that.

Chelsea Myers (43:33)
I do, really appreciate it. I, so I'm curious too, moving forward, how did you approach talking, like your little one, was a toddler. So there's only a certain extent to which she's gonna understand the whole thing. I'm assuming she knew you were pregnant. Yeah.

Foster Wilson (43:45)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

she was two and a half at the time he passed. it was of our utmost, know, our biggest question was how do we talk about this with her? So we were fortunate enough through our midwife to be connected to a child psychologist, which we had two sessions with her just to figure out how to go about talking to our oldest about it. ⁓ her suggestion was to keep it, ⁓ well, both of us really wanted it to be.

quite honest, as honest as possible and to keep it very open and open conversation that could continue to happen as long as anytime she needed to talk about him in the process. The psychologist's advice was to create something in her language that was very, very simple. So what we did was just make a little like a ⁓ book and I put that in quotes, a book, which is a folded piece of paper with a front, a cover.

Chelsea Myers (44:51)
you

Yeah.

Foster Wilson (44:56)
And like two pages on the inside and a back. And it was the story of Wilde. And it was just very, very simple terms. And it was like, we were pregnant. We were very happy. Mommy was pregnant. It was very happy to have this baby. We were all excited. We found out the baby was sick and couldn't make it. And, you know, we were all sad, but he lives in our hearts or something like really simple. And so we presented that to her and talked about it with her.

And then the idea with a book is that she can pull it out and bring it to us anytime she wants to talk about Wilde and she's having feelings about it, doesn't know how to express it. We can read that book together and talk about it. And that gave her some power in this situation. And it's not like a one-time conversation and then it's over. ⁓ So that was really helpful and we hung on to that.

Chelsea Myers (45:45)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (45:51)
really well, know, and she kids are kids are amazing. You know, they just can process things in a way that sometimes adults cannot. And she ⁓ was not sad. She was like very straightforward about it. so this happened. so and then this. OK. So where is he? OK. You know, ⁓ they were very basic. was very verbal, a two and a half. But they were very simple questions that were very logical. And like she went on about

Chelsea Myers (46:16)
Yeah. ⁓

Foster Wilson (46:20)
her afternoon, you know, and didn't have a lot of emotion about it. we continue to just, you know, we were having a lot of emotion that we didn't want to be hiding from her. So she comforted us at times and we spread his ashes together and we brought him up a lot in conversation. and ⁓ still to this day, ⁓ that is something that is talked about in our family quite a lot.

His name comes up a lot, if we see it out somewhere, a restaurant has named that, we point it out, and look Wilde, you know? So I'm actually really happy about how that went, you know? Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (46:55)
Yeah.

Yeah,

think just like you said, you met her where she was at and left the door open for her to talk about it again. And I know, listeners don't know, you did go on to have another child.

Foster Wilson (47:12)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (47:21)
How? This ⁓ is a difficult question to word.

I don't want to say like, when did you make that decision? ⁓ What was the process like for you deciding to walk this path again?

Foster Wilson (47:31)
Man.

Yeah, gosh. ⁓ It's for me, I'll speak only for me because I have, unfortunately, have other friends who've been down a similar path and make quite different decisions and it's so unique. My desire to have something positive come out of this included the idea and the hope that I would have another child very quickly. And that was because

Chelsea Myers (47:52)
Mm-hmm.

Foster Wilson (48:06)
I thought if I am pregnant right away, it kind of ensures that that child would not have happened had he been born. Do you know? And I somehow that was comforting to me that like I know I would know this new life was ⁓ was a bonus, you know? And so I was quite eager.

Chelsea Myers (48:15)
Mmm.

Foster Wilson (48:31)
And I knew that pregnancy is a long time and I had quite a lot of grieving left to do, but I wanted to be doing that while I was also like waiting for this new life. And ⁓ my husband at the time was not as eager. He felt maybe that was too soon. ⁓ But we because he, you know, he just he's like, what's the rush kind of thing? Like, we should all process this. And that's also very valid. ⁓

Chelsea Myers (48:33)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Foster Wilson (48:59)
The end, think we only waited. ⁓ It was in August when he passed and we began trying again at the end of the year. And by January we were pregnant again. ⁓ So it wasn't right away, but it was again quickly that had not been something that was a struggle for us. And so then the journey of, you know, being pregnant a third time with this behind me and with the first birth being quite.

you know, having a lot of complications and some small t traumas as well, was an anxiety-filled pregnancy to say the least. I'm not really a super anxious person, but that brought out every anxiety that I had. And ⁓ I just couldn't wait for it to be over, unfortunately. I didn't enjoy that one quite as much. I was just really ready to get this healthy baby into the world and like breathe again, basically.

Chelsea Myers (49:35)
Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Foster Wilson (49:56)
⁓ I had a real hang up about whether what the fascinatingly enough, what the gender of this child would be. at the time that meant something to me. That's not really anything to me now, but at the time I was like, is this going to be another boy? Like I had lost or is this going to be a girl and that's different? And like, for me, my brain just was super hung up on that being like a really

Not one was better than the other, but they were different things in my mind to be, you know. ⁓ And so that was something. ⁓ The gender of that child is not important, but ⁓ that was something that was really, for some reason just kept getting stuck on. So, ⁓ but I did develop cholestasis again with my youngest. That was not, that was something I knew to look for because it's quite.

Chelsea Myers (50:37)
You

Foster Wilson (50:54)
for it to repeat itself. And so I asked them to test me very early on and then it started to get, ⁓ the level started to go up a little bit, a little bit, a little bit, a little bit. And I was just being monitored a lot in this pregnancy. What happened to Wilde was a genetic fluke. It was not something to recur, but colostasis is quite common. So it was my comfort level for a lot of reasons.

to induce at 37 weeks, knowing I'd already been diagnosed with colostasis. The levels weren't that high, weren't that urgent, but I was ready to have this baby. And not something that I would recommend to lot of my clients. It's not really something that is like, okay, at 37 weeks, you should just induce your baby. But I was like, this is my comfort level. And yeah, I had an induction and

had a vaginal delivery, had a VBAC with that baby and they were completely healthy, actually quite robust and healthy for a 37 week old. the story of the VBAC was also an induction, right? So also this long process and pitocin and all of these things. And I had a birth doula when I was in the hospital and it was a real

fiery animalistic birth. was, I was like operating completely out of passion and like in my body and a determination to do this the way that I really wanted to do this and feel the pain and feel the ring of fire and all of the things. And I did that and I did that and I had them vaginally

And once they were here, everything really calmed down. And I could let go of the anxiety and I could see my baby and feed my baby and kind of enter into this next stage, which included more grieving, but still was like an exhale and knew I was done having children and all of that.

Chelsea Myers (53:06)
Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, that is, like I'm, I'm speechless right now. ⁓ well, it doesn't, it doesn't happen often, but just to hear, to hear, obviously, not obviously the anxiety that you felt throughout your pregnancy must have been overwhelming. And I, I can absolutely understand, it, like, I just want him, I want them to be here.

Foster Wilson (53:31)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (53:41)
I just want them

Foster Wilson (53:41)
Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (53:42)
to be here. ⁓ And you talk about grieving continuing after bringing baby home. What did that look like for you? So you're postpartum and you're dealing with all of the normal postpartum changes and hormones and you've got two kids now. Well, you have three kids, but you have two kids at home with you. How did grieving transform in that?

Foster Wilson (53:47)
Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, I want to say that in the year, basically one year from Wilde to my youngest was I had a lot of support. had ⁓ the privilege to be in therapy. I was with an individual therapist, not the child psychologist, but somebody that she referred and ⁓ that woman continued to be my therapist off and on for the last 10 years.

⁓ Is now a guest on my podcast. What if we could talk about later? But like really kind of cool for a full circle I had so much support in that regard. And so I was really able to Do some good healing deep healing with her ⁓ Grief counseling or whatever you want to call it at the time, but I And I was in a support group for parents who had had different kinds of infant and perinatal losses and so

Chelsea Myers (54:37)
You

Foster Wilson (55:05)
I was well supported. My partner was very supportive of me being able to get to all of those things, which was hard ⁓ and financially to be able to make that happen. So I want to say that because I had a lot, a good chunk of it under my belt already when my youngest came along. ⁓ I feel like my postpartum at that point was a blur. ⁓ I it was chaos and ⁓ but joy and just.

Chelsea Myers (55:25)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (55:32)
I didn't adjust to two children very well. I found the transition from zero to one to be very easy, the transition from one to two to be very difficult. And I find that some people are either in one camp or the other. Uh-huh. It is really challenging. This like first child needs, second child needs, and then the dynamic of the two of them being at conflict and not leaving any room for my personal needs.

Chelsea Myers (55:46)
I'm in your camp.

Yes.

Foster Wilson (56:02)
I found to be way more overwhelming than I ever thought and there are things that I still struggle with today and my kids are much older. was, you know, it was lot. I continued to honor Wilde through my youngest. They also know about him, talk about him. That child has a lot of...

access to the supernatural, I want to say. There's lot of mentions of Wilde and also past pets that we had that passed before they were born and like a lot of things that ⁓ kind of make me smile, honestly, when they bring it up. ⁓ And yeah, so that became a part of the story, the story of like how you got here, know, Wilde made room for you and

Chelsea Myers (56:31)
Wow.

Yeah!

Foster Wilson (56:55)
carve the path for you. I don't know how they feel about that, honestly, we honor the birthday, his birthday. It's different every year. I have different feelings every year on his birthday. Sometimes I write, sometimes I light a candle, sometimes I don't want to talk to anybody, some days I forget, some years I forget. It's like, it's a real roller coaster, but it is an access point, I feel like, on his birthday to...

Chelsea Myers (57:15)
Yeah.

Foster Wilson (57:23)
come back to him and to at least put some attention there. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (57:30)
Yeah, I'm so glad that you that you talked about the range of of just not only feelings, but just what you are experience yourself and as a family, because it's all valid, right? Like you said, sometimes I forget sometimes and that's okay. It doesn't it doesn't take away the love for Wilde or your other children. It doesn't take away the grief. It just means that that's how it manifested that at that point. And then

Foster Wilson (57:41)
Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (57:58)
and it's all real and it's all valid and it's all okay. So you've spoken so beautifully. know we kind of rushed through all three of your children's stories and your story, but you've taken the time that we've had and you've given so much. Like I truly do.

I feel so thankful to have been able to sit in this with you and to learn and to ⁓ experience what I experienced with the dragonfly thing. ⁓ So I kind of want to transition us into what it is you're doing now and how your experiences may have shaped how you work.

Foster Wilson (58:36)
Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (58:50)
with moms and families.

Foster Wilson (58:52)
Yeah, I so now I work as a postpartum doula as I mentioned, and that work found me, you know, I've been in the film industry for a long time as a director, filmmaker, producer. in the last couple of years, my I just turned and looked at what was calling me. And this is the work that was calling me. ⁓ I thought that I would do birth work. ⁓ And instead, I fell in love with the postpartum period. And I really

love and I'm so honored by the ability to step into someone's home and to really sit with them in that less... ⁓ I don't know, the birth is a little bit like a wedding, right? And it's like flashy and there's all kinds of things and this postpartum period is murky and it's confusing and it's sometimes chaotic and sometimes very scary.

Chelsea Myers (59:36)
Yes!

Foster Wilson (59:48)
and a wide range as you know, that, you know, with and without PMADS and perinatal mental health disorders, like it is, it's murky, right? So to be able to like be there with someone and honor all of what's going on is just so beautiful. And I am so filled with passion for the work that I do for people being able to like get, be seen in postpartum and to be

Chelsea Myers (59:58)
Yeah!

Foster Wilson (1:00:17)
heard and I say I always say that and I stole this from somebody else so it's not my phrase but like the all postpartum work is grief work. There is so much grief in processing the birth that you had versus the birth that you wanted the feeding experience that you're having versus the feeding experience you might have imagined the your relationship changing you have a loss of identity you have ⁓

Chelsea Myers (1:00:27)
Mm-hmm.

Foster Wilson (1:00:44)
so much loss and that is not talked about with a healthy child and a healthy parent. Even in those situations there is loss. So sometimes I'm really just asking questions and shining a light on what may be under the surface ⁓ and physically and emotionally supporting these families. that is a gift to me to be able to do that work as long as I end up doing it.

Chelsea Myers (1:00:51)
Bye.

Foster Wilson (1:01:15)
And what I've done is, you know, I've started to build a course to help families be intentional about their postpartum experience. And so I teach people, you know, either one on one or in small groups about how what's what may or may not change in your relationship, what may or may not change for you personally and how to let go of some of the ⁓

identity that you have now and kind of prepare yourself to cross the threshold into parenthood and then how to be able to navigate the uncertainties, the discomfort, ⁓ and the loss that can be there. Joy and loss, joy and grief can coexist in the same moment. So yeah, that is what I do right now and it's lovely.

Chelsea Myers (1:02:03)
Yes.

Yeah. And it, it, does sound like you found your calling. It sounds like the culmination of, of that caretaker side of you, that go-getter side of you, that, um, just the mother in you just kind of led you to where you are. like I said, I, I, I am all about the doulas, the doulas and the postpartum doulas, but

you in particular, like in learning about you and in meeting you today, like this, you seem to be like totally stepping into your power. Like these families are so lucky to have you in their corner. ⁓

Foster Wilson (1:02:38)
Hmm.

No.

⁓ thank you.

Yeah, thank you. My own personal experiences, you know, needed to happen in the way they did. And then I needed to have a lot of space between that time and helping people because like we talked about with nannying and having your own children, right? There needed to be like a cocooning of space for meetup process. Even, you know, a lot of people say postpartum goes up to seven years, right? So, ⁓

Chelsea Myers (1:03:01)
Yes.

Foster Wilson (1:03:14)
I needed my children to be in that range before I did this, but yeah, thank you. I appreciate that. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (1:03:16)
Yeah.

⁓

So I want to give you the opportunity to let listeners know, especially if they want to learn more about you, if they want to learn more about what you're doing. ⁓ These will all be listed in your show notes, but where is the best place for them to find you and what you're up to?

Foster Wilson (1:03:39)
Sure. Well, yeah, so I also co-host a podcast. So it's really wonderful when people, if they've enjoyed this and they want to hear more from me and my partner, we co-host a podcast called Beauty in the Break. And it's all about life's breaking moments and how we find beauty in them and on the other side of them. So they're personal stories of resilience. He's had quite a lot of experiences in his life that are even hard to fathom.

you know, in addition to all of this that I've experienced, there's quite a lot of stories we have, but we also have guests on as well telling, you know, their own perspectives on things like that. And it's been ⁓ really joyous and beautiful to share space with my partner. ⁓ So people can find me there. It's on all podcast platforms. And then to connect with me directly through my website, fosterwilson.com. There's more information about my doula services. I also came out with a

book of poetry last year called Afternoon Abundance, Poetry for Wilde Souls. so there's, yeah, thank you. There is a lot in that book about ⁓ parenthood, motherhood, grief, loss, and also identity and ⁓ coming, it feels like it ⁓ tracks this idea of digging really deep into a dark place and coming out on the other side and finding the light.

Chelsea Myers (1:04:43)
It's on my list. Yeah.

Foster Wilson (1:05:07)
but maintaining those deep roots that we talked about. And so that's available on my website and on all of the major booksellers and whatnot. yeah, fosterwilson.com and you can reach out to me directly. I love a direct email or ⁓ voice note. I'm all about the voice notes. Please, yes. It's my favorite mode of communication. You get to hear somebody's like,

Chelsea Myers (1:05:11)
Yeah.

I'm learning. I'm learning to get on board with the voice notes.

Foster Wilson (1:05:36)
tone which is so loss these days so I appreciate it.

Chelsea Myers (1:05:37)
It's true. ⁓ It's true. just can't.

can't. Text is my love language, but I'm learning and I'm trying. I'm growing. I'm getting there. Thank you for sharing that. Your book of poetry is on my list. say that my guest, my guest, I have a list a mile long, but I'm going to get to all of them. And yes, your podcast will be linked and that is now on my list as well.

Foster Wilson (1:05:45)
Yeah. Yeah, totally. Yeah.

⁓ so sweet.

Yes.

Thank you.

Chelsea Myers (1:06:06)
now that I know it exists. So what I'm in this, in the vein of, guess, like voice notes and text messages, that's ironic. ⁓ I'm doing something a little different with the end of my podcasts now. ⁓ What I'm doing is I'm asking us to kick it back to the days before voice notes, before text messages, when all we had was a landline. And if you wanted someone to know you called, you had to leave a message.

Foster Wilson (1:06:06)
Thank you. Yeah. Yeah.

huh. huh.

Okay.

Chelsea Myers (1:06:36)
So you don't know who my next guest is gonna be. You don't know anything about them or their story, but you called Quiet Connection today and they weren't here to answer. So you are gonna leave them a message and you can interpret that in whatever way feels right to you.

Foster Wilson (1:06:45)
It's good.

Okay, okay, here it goes. ⁓

Chelsea Myers (1:07:00)
Okay.

Foster Wilson (1:07:02)
Hello, it is so good for you to be here. And I am so glad you're on the show. And I just have to tell you you're rad and your story matters. And I am here to listen. So please speak up and take up space because we are all here to listen to you.

Chelsea Myers (1:07:20)
Oh my God, I love that so much. What? No, I do. What's been so fun about this is that every response has been so wildly different and you are the first one who has brought so much energy into it. And I love it. I love it so much. Um, so you're going to have to come back and listen to the, to the episode before yours to get your message and see if it resonates. Um, yeah, it's a little, I don't know. I'm trying something. We're seeing how

Foster Wilson (1:07:44)
Yes, have fun.

I love

that. I love creativity in podcasting. It's my favorite.

Chelsea Myers (1:07:55)
I'm trying we'll see we'll see how it goes but Foster thank you so so so much for sharing space with me sharing your story with me sharing Wilde with me and ⁓ yeah I'm just I'm so thankful that we connected

Foster Wilson (1:08:11)
Thank you, Chelsea. I appreciate you having this space. It's so important and vital that we all have a place to be able to hear these stories and you're doing incredible work. So I salute you.

Chelsea Myers (1:08:22)
Thank you so much.